Welcome Overstayed

One should never stay in a place for too long, because the gracious host can begin to feel put upon, and wish the visitor would never return. Of course, sometimes things happen, but it is really up to the guest to make sure that the length of time they said they would stay is truly the length of time they stay. Friendships can be destroyed when one friend violates the rule to “Never overstay your welcome.”

Hans Christian Andersen, the famous Danish author known for his fairy tales translated into over a hundred languages, traveled to London in 1847 to expand his audience beyond Denmark. Already a well-known writer in his home country, Andersen sought translators to help share his work internationally. At the time, Charles Dickens had several published books, and Andersen, a devoted admirer who called Dickens “the greatest writer of our time,” seized the chance to meet him at a party they both attended.

Andersen was thrilled to meet his literary idol and even shared his excitement in a letter to his friends in Denmark after meeting Dickens. It seemed that Dickens enjoyed the encounter as well, as he left Andersen a package containing copies of his books and a note. Andersen soon returned to Denmark, and over the years, the two exchanged letters, although Andersen appeared more eager to maintain the friendship than Dickens. Nine years later, Dickens extended an invitation for Andersen to stay at his home if he visited England again, though it was likely more out of politeness than genuine friendship.

Andersen finally visited Dickens in March 1857, planning to stay for two weeks but extending his stay to five. It was a tense time at the Dickens household, with the author preoccupied with a play and considering divorcing his wife. Andersen’s presence only added to the strain. From the moment he arrived, things were awkward, especially when he requested one of Dickens’ sons to shave him daily. As bizarre as that sounds, it was a common courtesy for male guests in Denmark. Finding the request odd, Dickens arranged for Andersen to be shaved at a barbershop each day instead.

Andersen was known for being emotional, once crying loudly while watching Dickens perform in a play. He even broke down on Dickens’ front lawn after receiving a harsh review for one of his works. Dickens was just not a fan of Andersen. Dickens couldn’t wait for Andersen to leave. After five weeks, the Dickens family was relieved when their guest finally left. Dickens was so angry, that he wrote on the guest room mirror, “Hans Andersen slept in this room for five weeks — which seemed to the family AGES!” Any friendship that might have existed between the men was now over. The moral of the story is…never overstay your welcome.