Loss
My sister, Caryl Reed and her husband, Mike are living their dream life on a ranch west of Casper, Wyoming, which was the clear choice for their retirement years. Caryl was born in Casper, and our family has mostly lived here since right before Caryl was born. Caryl, however, has lived a number of places, so moving back here was a homecoming for her. They have been living here for a number of years now, and we have all been so blessed to have them near to the family. Like all of our family, this birthday will be a harder one, because of the passing of our sister, Alena Stevens, but we all consider ourselves blessed to have been near her and able to have sister get togethers over the years. Spending time with siblings is so important, and we five girls have always been close, so having Caryl back in Casper was an integral part of that continued closeness.
Caryl and Mike like to travel, and they have taken a number of great trips over the years, including Japan, when their son Allen Beach was stationed there; Oregon to visit Allen and his wife, Gaby; and Hawaii in 2023, where they spent a wonderful two weeks; and a number of other places over the years. While travel is great, 
their main location love is their home. They love the ranch atmosphere. Their house sits off the road a way, so they don’t hear traffic noises, and they are able to just enjoy the sounds of nature. They grow hay to sell, and that keeps them busy. Of course, Mike does most of the maintenance work and watering, and they hire the harvest, but they have really enjoyed watching the crops grow and have enjoyed the smell of the cut harvest.
Caryl and Mike have been married almost 23 years now, and they are just perfect for each other. They love doing the same things and have the same goals for their home and lives. Daughter, Andrea Beach and her son Chris Spicer have rented from them for a few years now, living in the apartment they built over the garage and recreation room. While it has been nice to have then pop in when they get home from work, the distance hasn’t really been ideal for them with their jobs, so this summer they plan to move into town. I know that will be a little bit hard on Caryl, because she has liked having her daughter so close, but at least they aren’t moving far away. Caryl, Andrea, and Chris take a week each summer and go to the Black Hills. They love seeing the sights, and that will continue, so that will be nice.
Caryl and Mike love being close to all of us sisters too, and to have a great church to attend. Most of the family attends the same church, and of course we take up about four rows of seats. Caryl and Mike didn’t really have a church when they were living in Rawlins, Wyoming. It’s a small town and there weren’t many churches, so they just caught the services our church put on Facebook and looked forward to the day they could attend regularly…and now they can. Today is Caryl’s birthday. Happy birthday Caryl!! Have a great day!! We love you!!
This is likely to be the hardest birthday my brother-in-law, Mike Stevens will ever have. It has only been 25 days since his wife, Alena Stevens went home to be with the Lord. It has been a deeply sad 25 days for all of us, but even more so for Mike, because Alena was the love of his life, his other half, his life partner, and he never wanted their time together to be so short. The were married almost 41 years, and they had built a wonderful life together, and now, he must go on without her. This will be a long transition for Mike, and I just feel so bad for him. It’s such an empty feeling for him. I’m thankful that he has their children, Michelle Miller, Garrett Stevens, and Lacey Killinger to comfort him too. The kids have been staying closely in touch and letting him know that they are there for him. Mike is a good grandpa, and he loves spending time with the kids, Elliott and Maya Stevens, as well as Brooklyn and Jaxon Killinger whenever he can too. 
Over recent years, Mike has been helping brothers-in-law, Mike Reed and Chris Hadlock with various projects they have been doing, so they have become good friends. That is such a blessing, because they are always working on something, and Mike can help them with those projects, and that helps too. Mike Reed has been rebuilding and flipping cars, and Mike Stevens has been helping him with those too. It’s almost become a lucrative new business venture for them. They have become good friends. That friendship has been a source of strength for Mike Stevens through these hard days since Alena’s passing.
Mike has always loved golfing, hunting, and working on cars, and I know that these things will help him to stay busy as time goes on. He is very dedicated to the Lord and attends church every Sunday too. That will also be a source of comfort for him in the days ahead. I know that Mike is going to be ok, but right now, his feelings are very raw, as they are with all of the family. There is just no way to lose your other half, and not feel very 
incomplete for the rest of your life. I know that while Mike will never get over Alena’s passing, he will pick himself up with the help of the family and get on with it, because that is truly all you can do. Today is Mike’s birthday, and while it’s a hard one, I hope there will be some moments of happiness too. Happy birthday Mike. You are in our prayers for peace and comfort. We love you very much.
On May 11, 2025, our family lost another sweet member. My uncle, Jim Richards went home to be with his Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Uncle Jim was born on October 19, 1937, in Bassett, Nebraska, to John and Mayme (Murer) Richards. Uncle Jim joined our family on June 3, 1961, when he married my aunt, Dixie (Byer) Richards. Together they had three children, Jeannie Liegman, Jim Richards (who passed away on February 16, 2021), and Raylynn Williams. Their union was also blessed with six grandchildren, Jacob Liegman, Gabriel Williams, Gideon Williams, Noah Williams, Jonah Williams (who lives in Heaven), and Mayme Williams. The family is very close, and they all consider themselves to be greatly blessed. Uncle Jim was truly the rock of this family, and everyone came to him for wisdom, advise, strength.
Uncle Jim’s dad, John Richards passed away in 1945, when Uncle Jim was just a young boy of seven…one month shy of eight years old. Losing his dad, changed Uncle Jim’s life in so many ways, but probably the most significant way was that he effectively gave up his childhood and became the man of the house. Of course, he had older siblings, but Uncle Jim took the support of the family very seriously. He just knew what was needed, and he did it. His whole family looked to him for guidance many times. That shows that he possessed wisdom beyond his young years. Uncle Jim helped his family many times over the years, even after he was married to Aunt Dixie. Several of his family members lived with them over the years. They knew that when times were 
tough, Uncle Jim and Aunt Dixie would be there for them.
Uncle Jim also loved the family he married into very much too, showing them the same kind of love that he showed his own family. When he and Aunt Dixie were married, there was a situation that took everyone by surprise a little bit. When my sister, Alena (Spencer) Stevens was born to my parents, Allen and Collene (Aunt Dixie’s sister) Spencer on June 2, 1961, it meant that my mom would not be able to attend her little sister’s wedding. My mom loved weddings, and her sister, and she was very disappointed, so after the wedding ceremony and before the reception, Uncle Jim and Aunt Dixie, dressed in their wedding clothes, came to the hospital to see the baby, and to show his new sister-in-law how they looked. It was such a sweet and precious moment, and my mom was so happy. Uncle Jim and my sister, Alena can reminisce in Heaven now, because my sister went to Heaven on April 23, 2025, less than a month ahead of Uncle Jim. I can imagine the reunion in Heaven with all those who have gone before. And Uncle Jim can see his son Jimmy Ray again, as well as get to know his grandson, little Jonah Williams too. Reconnecting with all of his family will be one of the treasures of Heaven for him.
Uncle Jim was the last of his parents’ children left living. He was blessed with a long life. The Bible tells us in the fourth commandment to “honor your father and mother, that it may be well with you, and you may live long on the earth.” Uncle Jim lived long upon this earth. He was good to his parents and to his in-laws. When my 
grandpa (his father-in-law), George Byer was ill, and Grandma Hattie Byer needed help, Uncle Jim and Aunt Dixie and their kids closed up their home and moved in with Grandma and Grandpa for the time they were needed until Grandpa passed away. That was such a blessing to Grandma, who really needed their help. Uncle Jim’s mother Mayme Richards lived with them too as she grew older and needed more help. Uncle Jim was all about family and that included his extended family too. Kindness and compassion simply flowed from Uncle Jim’s heart, and I know that even people who barely knew him felt the exact same way. Uncle Jim will be deeply missed by everyone who knew him. We love you, Uncle Jim, and we look forward to seeing you again when we are all reunited in Heaven.
There are few things that feel as strange as having your sibling graduate to Heaven. Like it or not, at some point, you expect your parents to go home, but a sibling, especially a younger sibling…well, you just don’t expect it. My sister, Alena Stevens was a beautiful woman inside and out, and we always thought she would be with us. Nevertheless, on Wednesday, April 23, 2025, Alena quietly slipped from this Earth and woke up in Heaven. We know where she is and we know that she is happy…very happy, but for those of us left behind, this is really hard. It has been especially hard for her sweet husband, Mike Stevens, because he has lost his life partner, and he loved her so very much. It’s also been very hard on their children, Michelle (Matt) Miller, Garrett (Kayla) Stevens, and Lacey (Chris) Killinger, and the grandkids, Elliott Stevens, Maya Stevens, Brooklyn Killinger, and Jaxon Killinger.
Our childhood was really what I would call idyllic. We had great parents, who took us on many trips around the United States. We traveled by car…and old station wagon, and as was typical in those days, we got to hang out in the far back end of the wagon. No one wore seatbelts in those days, and laying in the back end with the sun shining on us made for a warm little nest we played and sang songs as we traveled. With five girls, our parents found that singing was a great way to pass the time as we traveled, and thus avoid the inevitable question, “Are we there yet?” I don’t recall really ever dealing with that on our travels, but I remember that Alena loved to prank us. She had a great sense of humor, and she might pull a prank quietly, and then be seen trying to hide a giggle as the prank played out. She did delight in that, and she was very good at it. I don’t think there was one of us who didn’t “fall victim” to an Alena prank at one time or another…and when she got you, she always had this satisfied little grin that would light up her face.
While pranking and teasing were both in her nature, so was loving kindness. Alena had a soft heart, and that 
made her a natural-born teacher-educational support member. Alena spent most of her working years as an educational support member at Verda James Elementary School, where she left a legacy of shaping young minds. Her students loved her and the teachers and staff she worked with couldn’t have asked for a better friend. She had a soft, gently way about her, and she had a heart for people. She had a way of settling down a student who was upset, and the students never forgot her kindness to them. Both students and staff have stayed friends with her for many years. For years, Alena was a fixture at Verda James Elementary School, and when she retired on June 8, 2020, it left an empty place there.
After her retirement, she went on to do the things she had looked forward to for years. Alena loved her role as wife, mother, and grandmother, and spent as much time with each of them as she could. Alena and Mike loved traveling, golfing, watching television, and going to her happy place…Pathfinder Reservoir. She always loved the lake. She thrived there. Alena was so proud of her children, and the adults they became. She watched them learn and grow, and was thrilled at the paths each of them chose. She knew then so well that she knew long before they grew up, exactly what field they would go into. She could see it in their personalities. When the grandchildren, Elliott Stevens, Maya Stevens, Brooklyn Killinger, and Jaxon Killinger came along, Alena was thrilled. She would spend as much time as she could with them. They all love her very much.
Over the years, our sister group has seen many phases. Childhood to adulthood. Friends to Prayer Warriors. As this new reality began, I felt like there was a “chink” in the armor of the Sister Prayer Warriors, but then the Lord reminded me that Alena is still praying with us, as are our parents, they just pray from a different location. It’s good to think of our close-knit sister group still being intact, and I know we will all get used to this 
new reality at some point, but we will never stop missing Alena. It is really awful to have to say, “goodbye for now” to our sister, because we can’t imagine life without her in it. Still, we know that she would not want us to be sad, so we will remember all the good times and look forward to when we will see her again. We love you Alena, and we miss you so very much.
As another year without my dad, Allen Spencer, slips behind me, I find myself wondering where the years could have gone. How could it be eighteen years on this earth without my dad. I somehow had this idea for most of my young life, that he would always be here. Oh, I know that thought isn’t even reasonable, but then most kids aren’t reasonable, are they? My dad was an amazing dad. He was always so patient and kind. Even in the face of homework struggles, he remained calm and patient. If we came home with a bad progress report, he just said, “Well, we will have to work on that then”…and we did. He and mom, Collene Spencer managed to pull all five of their girls through the school years and into successful adulthood.
Having five daughters, and no sons, my dad lived a unique kind of life. He was always outnumbered, especially when it came to time in the bathroom, while five girls were trying to get ready for school or some other function. I don’t know how he managed, considering that our house only had one bathroom. He must have 
rushed in their around 5:00am, so he could get out by the time we were awake. He didn’t even complain…too much. He was always proud of his beautiful wife and daughters, and he knew that “all that beauty” took time, so he let us have our time and space to get to where we felt ready to face the world. Nevertheless, I’m sure he wondered if he would ever get in the bathroom sometimes.
Dad was a veteran of World War II and served as a Flight Engineer-Top Turret Gunner on a B-17 Bomber. It was an occupation of which we were all very proud, and Dad was very proud to serve his country. While he was very proud to serve his country, and proud of his time on the B-17, Dad never really talked about the war. That was common for men of that era. They simply did what they had to do, and never really told the tales about it. I was always sorry about that, because I think my sisters and I would have loved to hear more about his time in the Army Air Force. We did get a glimpse, years later, when two of his grandchildren did an interview for a class 
project, and Dad finally opened up a little. He also opened up once with his older brother, Bill Spencer, and as we listened to their conversation, we caught a little bit about what they remembered. It was all very interesting, but hard to wrap our heads around, as it seemed almost more like a movie by then. Still, we knew that he was an honored member of the service, and that made us very proud. Today would have been my dad’s 101st birthday. Happy birthday in Heaven, Dad. We love and miss you very much and can’t wait until we see you again.
From the time they moved to Superior, Wisconsin, my mom, Collene Spencer found her new best friend in her sister-in-law, Doris Spencer. They actually lived across the yard from each other. There wasn’t an alley between them, just a fence. It was a very cozy place for the two families, and as the kids came along, it made it easy to play without worrying about the little ones getting out into the street. Aunt Doris and my mom were very close and did just about everything together. Those were some crazy times. They were always on some diet, including when they went to a restaurant and asked for a cup of hot water, to which they added ketchup to make a soup. They figured that it would be the lowest calorie item they could have. Another time, when they were both feeling particularly hungry, Aunt Doris suggested that they each eat one puffed wheat…just one. Like that would satisfy any kind of craving. I can’t help but laugh at the goofiness of those two.
Aunt Doris lived the longest life of all of my dad’s family, passing away November 21, 2024, at the good old age of 100 years. Not many people get to live that long, and it is always a very cool thing when they do. She lived a good live, staying active for many years. The last time we took my mom to see her, before my mom passed, Aunt Doris was still doing a lot of walking around the assisted living facility where she lived. For a time she lived at Harmony House, which pleased her so much, because her grandson and his mother both worked there, so she felt especially loved.
I think that one of the things she was rather proud of, was the fact that she reached that milestone of 100 years. The party that was thrown for her was amazing, and she was so pleased. I don’t think she knew it 
would be her last birthday, but in the end, it was. We were all very sorry to have her leave us when she went, but she was ready, I think. Aunt Doris left us on November 21, 2024, and it was a very sad day for us, but a great day for her, because now, she is in Heaven. She is happy and healthy, and with Jesus and the Father, as well as her family members who have gone on before. I can see the celebration she is still having with them, and that makes me so happy. Today would have been Aunt Doris 101st birthday. Happy birthday in Heaven, Aunt Doris. We love and miss you very much.
A couple of days ago, we found out that our aunt, Esther Hein had passed away. She was 84 years old. Esther was the eldest of my husband, Bob’s grandmother’s children from her second marriage. I am so sorry to see her go. With her passing, all of Grandma’s children are gone. It is now left to the grandchildren to carry on the legacy Grandma started. Esther had lived much of her adult life in California and Oregon, choosing that milder climate over the harsh Montana winters. Because of where they lived, we didn’t see Esther’s family very often, but she did her best to come for visits to see her parents, Walt and Vina Hein, and siblings Marion Kanta, Walt Schulenberg, Eddie Hein, and Butch Hein and their families in Montana and Wyoming as often as she could manage.
It was on one of her trips to visit her parents, that I first met Esther. It was a good meeting for me, because when I married into the family, my husband Bob asked me to just cut his hair for him. Well, that was a really bad plan. I had never cut a guy’s hair, and it looked awful. His mother had to try to fix it. Ugh!! While we were visiting Grandma and Grandpa, Bob decided to ask Esther to cut his hair. She was trained to do that, so it was a 
good plan. Esther took pity on me, and she taught me how to cut Bob’s hair. It is a skill that has served me well over the last 50 years, and one for which I will always be thankful to Esther for…as will Bob.
Esther was as skilled seamstress and artist. I remember a set of bathroom curtains she made for my mother-in-law, (her sister-in-law) Joann Schulenberg. She loved them and in her later years, while I was taking care of her when she had Alzheimer’s Disease, she never forgot to tell me about the beautiful curtains that Esther had made for her. My mother-in-law loved Esther dearly. When they were first married, my mother-in-law and father-in-law, Walt Schulenberg often kept Esther at their house in town during the harsh Montana winters, so she wouldn’t miss school, because they couldn’t always get her to town from the ranch. Esther was almost like their own daughter, except that they were too young to have a daughter her age at the time. Esther never forgot how special they were to her, and when she started painting, she painted a landscape picture on a saw 
blade for her brother, Walt. He cherished it always. She also painted a set of TV trays for him, one of which I have now. Her work was beautiful. While she couldn’t come for visits anymore, she loved keeping in touch with the family, and spoke to my sister-in-law, Debbie Cook on a regular basis. They were very close. My sister-in-law, Brenda Schulenberg also kept her updated by printing out and mailing her many of the family stories from my blog. Esther loved reading all about the younger generation as they grew up. Esther was a beautiful soul, and we are going to miss her very much.
Our grandfather, Andrew Schulenberg was a man of fortitude. One event from his teen years could easily have killed him or at the very least crippled him, but he wouldn’t let a “little thing” like having to have his leg amputated following a hunting accident, stop him. Young Andy spent a year in the hospital, while the doctors tried desperately to save his badly damaged leg, but in the end, the leg was too badly damaged and infected, so they had to amputate. That must have been a devastating event for a fifteen-year-old boy, but Grandpa had fortitude, and he refused to let it take him down. He hadn’t spent a year in the hospital fighting for his life to give up on it now. His life would be different than he expected, but then that happens to a lot of people. Although probably not to the degree that it did with Grandpa.
Grandpa went on to do many things in his lifetime. He farmed in the Forsyth, Montana area until the late 1920’s. Then, he owned and operated his own trucking company…hauling grains, coal, corn, and beets in the 
1930’s. Following his years in trucking, Grandpa worked for the State Highway Department until 1946 and also operated the Kokomo Club, west of Forsyth until 1950. It was really at this point that Grandpa’s life really changed, and at this time that he was going to face his biggest challenges. At that point, in the early 1950s, he began serving as undersheriff and then, served as the Sheriff of Rosebud County from 1955 to 1972. This may not have seemed so remarkable for most people, but remember that Grandpa had a literal peg leg from the time he was 15 years old. I remember his leg well. It was not like the peg legs you see in the pirate cartoons, but was rather a good-sized leg, much like carrying a small tree trunk around with you, and yet if you didn’t know he had it, you might not notice it. Grandpa was a big man, and his legs were strong. He carried that leg with a strength that was unmatched by anything most people could produce.
Remember too, that the reason Grandpa lost that leg was a hunting accident. He was shot in in the leg. That 
caused him to rather dislike guns…not a good thing for a sheriff. Nevertheless, the sheriff he was, and while there were guns in the trunk of the car, he was not known to carry one with him…and yet he was a highly successful sheriff. He just made his arrests without the use of a gun. Grandpa was a unique kind of a sheriff, but a very successful one indeed. He was well respected by everyone, including the Native Americans, who would even turn over their own wayward children, knowing that he would be fair, and they would avoid a life of crime. Hie time of service in the Rosebud County Sheriff’s Department was a career of which he was very proud, and so am I. Today is the 119th anniversary of Grandpa Andy Schulenberg’s birth. Happy birthday in Heaven, Grandpa. We love and miss you very much.
My sister-in-law, Rachel Schulenberg was born just three days after my husband and I were married. It seems strange that my sister-in-law was about the age of my own children, but then my husband’s family was spread out in years, and my brother-in-law, Ron was only seven years old when I married his brother. Rachel would have been 50 years old today, had not her life been cut short by a stroke on January 19, 2021. Rachel was a sweet Christian woman who loved the Lord and loved telling people about Jesus. She worked at a church in Powell for a number of years and was known to 
pray with anyone who needed prayer. She was a great servant of the Lord and loved by everyone who knew her.
Rachel was mom to three children, Cassie Franklin, Riley Birky, and Tucker Schulenberg, who was adopted by her husband, Ron Schulenberg (my brother-in-law), when he was 11 years old. She was a great mom, and her children were so very blessed. Rachel was also a grandmother to Lucas and Zoey and they were among her greatest treasures. Today she would also have Ryder and Alicen, as well as bonus grandson, Jace. Rachel would have loved having all these grandbabies. I wish she could have known the new ones and the future grandbabies. She would have loved having lots of grandbabies.
Rachel was only 45 years old when she passed away, so it’s coming up on five years now. I am always amazed at how fast the years following a loss just fly by. Before you know it, your loved one has been gone five, ten, fifteen years, and beyond, and with each passing year, you just continue to miss them. It is especially hard for 
the children of the one who has passed away. My heart aches for Cassie, Riley, and Tucker; and for the grandchildren too, especially Lucas and Zoey, who had the opportunity to know their grandma, and therefore to miss her very much. For them her loss is a heavy one. Today would have been Rachel’s 50th birthday. Happy birthday in Heaven, Rachel. We love and miss you very much.
My mother-in-law, Joann Schulenberg was a hard-working woman most of her life. It wasn’t necessarily that she did hard physical labor, but she always had busy hands. Having a garden vegetable garden all her life, she spent the harvest seasons canning vegetables to provide food for her family. She also canned meat whenever they raised a cow or purchased a side of beef. When she wasn’t canning, she was baking. Her house always had cake, cinnamon rolls, cookies, or some other such goodies for the snacking pleasure of her family. If you didn’t get your “sugar fix” you had only yourself to blame. Of course, that wasn’t always a good thing, because it was easy to overindulge on those fattening treats. Nevertheless, they were delicious, and always homemade. She was one to begin making dinner right after lunch, or sometimes even before. She was an excellent cook, and if you were a “meat and potatoes” kind of person, you were sure to get your fill.
When she wasn’t canning, baking, or cooking, my mother-in-law kept busy sewing, knitting, or crocheting. She made a living sewing clothing for a number of people, including my uncle, Jack McDaniels’ mom, for whom she sewed for a number of years. I only knew about that connection when I announced my engagement to my husband, Bob Schulenberg. My mother-in-law crocheted many afghans, that she sold at craft fairs and then received numerous orders for more. Those craft fairs left her with months of jobs and many referrals. One of 
my favorite items that my mother-in-law made was the “sweaters” she knitted. I use the word sweater lightly, because the ones she made were of a heavy yarn and equipped with a zipper, making them a coat. We all had one, and trust me, you didn’t need a coat.
Even after my mother-in-law developed Alzheimer’s Disease, she didn’t slow down. Yes, there were some things that went by the wayside. Things like finding store-bought cookies in the house, and less jar canned food, meaning that there were more store-bought canned foods in the house. She just couldn’t do those things so much anymore. We missed those things, but there was no help for it. Nevertheless, her crocheting remained. She had long been able to crochet “in her sleep” and never miss a stitch. That always amazed me, but when she had to be moved to a nursing home, because she required 24-hour care, she still crocheted. Of course, she didn’t use yarn at this stage, but she knew that her hands should be busy, so she would simply “crochet” with her oxygen tubing. The staff had no idea what she was doing, but after all those years, I knew what she was doing. When she would forget to hang on to her walker, because she was “fiddling” with her oxygen tubing, the concerned staff would panic, because they couldn’t get her to hang on. Upon seeing it in action, I simply asked her if I could hold her crocheting while she walked, all she said to me was, “Don’t lose a stitch!!” Once I “held her crocheting,” she would take hold of her walker, and proceed down the hallway…to the utter amazement of 
the staff. Of course, eventually the use of the walker went by the wayside, because she just couldn’t grasp the use of it anymore. That was sad, but she was perfectly content in her recliner wheelchair, because she never liked walking anyway. While her legs were no longer in use, her hands remained busy until the day she passed away. Today would have been my mother-in-law’s 94th birthday. Happy birthday in Heaven, Mom. We love and miss you very much.
