sister

After Mount Saint Helens blew up, and it had been deemed safe for tourism, my parents took a trip to Washington to visit my sister, Caryl and her family who were living in the Seattle area at the time. They decided to take a trip to see Mount St. Helens National Volcanic Monument. I’m not sure how many years after the eruption their trip was, but I do remember them telling me about how totally barren the whole place was. They told us about the buried cars and homes sticking out of the ash…broken and ruined. During that eruption, 57 people lost their lives, as well as countless numbers and species of wildlife. I can’t imagine the way that whole area must have felt to be in…so quiet and empty of life…almost like being on another planet.

Yes, it would be a trip of a lifetime…to be able to see an area devastated by a volcano eruption. It is such a powerful act of nature, and yet, behind it all is such a great loss of life and destruction of such beautiful land, and in this case, even a loss of the beautiful mountain top, now forever changed. So many trees were destroyed, literally blown over and burned in minutes. It is so strange to think that one minute the area was filled with wildlife, trees, and flowers, not to mention people…and the next minute it was all gone. Yes, they knew it was coming, but I’m sure many people truly didn’t believe it would happen, or at least that it would not be as bad as it was. I think that if they could have known what was coming, they would have left the area, but their minds couldn’t wrap themselves around that reality…in fact I don’t think most of the nation expected the eruption to be what it was. I know I was shocked by how devastating it was.

It has been over 32 years since that shocking day in our nation’s history. When I came across the pictures of my parents’ trip through the area, I began to wonder what the area looks like now. It would seem that the area is slow to return to life, but then I suppose that ash makes poor soil for many things to grow in. Weeds might do ok there, but trees and grass…maybe not so much. I don’t know how my parents or my sister, Caryl and her family felt about the area, but their pictures told the story of a disaster of epic proportions.

My dad was the younger brother. His sister Laura was 12 years older than he was, and his brother was 2 years older. Later there would be another sister, Ruth born in the family. The two brothers were, like most boys, always into something. I think Uncle Bill was so excited about having a little brother, that he set out to become a one man entertainment committee for my dad. He loved to make him laugh, and Uncle Bill could be quite funny…and mischievous. Through the years the two boys would get into lots of mischief, but when my dad was a little boy, his brother Bill was all about being a good big brother. He took his brother outside and played with him…which was a help to their mom too. He kept him laughing, and taught him how to do things…maybe not always a good thing.

Dad loved his big brother, and like most little boys, loved having his big brother pull him around in the wagon. But then what kid doesn’t. The wagon is almost like having a car, except that you have to find a motor for it, and the best motor is a big brother who doesn’t mind doing all the work, so his little brother, or sister, can have a good time. And Uncle Bill was a good big brother. He and my dad had lots of adventures, many wagon rides, fishing trips, and other such good times, but after all…what are big brothers for.

My nephew, Barry was another of those good big brothers to his brothers when they were little. Barry is also 10 years older than his brother JD, and almost 12 years older than his brother Eric. Barry was a big helper when his brothers were little. It was even easier for him to pull them around in the wagon. And they, like all other little kids, totally loved it. Big brothers can be the coolest of friends when their little brothers a pretty little. It doesn’t always continue on into the teenage years, but usually resurfaces when they grow up.

Like my dad and his brother, Barry and his brothers, JD and Eric are best of friends to this day. I think there is a bond between brothers that is very special. They are friends no matter the age difference. Yes, sisters have that too, but it is very different than brothers. When I look at how these boys were with each other, its easy to see that the little guys look up to the big guys…want to be just like them, and the big guys, whether they admit it or not, think their little brother is the greatest. They want to show their little brothers the ropes, do the guy things, and help them grow into good men, because after all, what are big brothers for.

Some little boys have such a sweet nature that it is almost surprising…especially when they are also a little bit tough guy. That pretty much describes my grand nephew, Matthew. When he was little he used to play fighting ninja on demand. He would try to make sure we all knew not to mess with him, and yet inside this little boy was a very kind heart. He loves to be a helper, especially when it involves his grandma, my sister, Cheryl. Matthew would do anything for her. He loves her so much. And second to her would have to be my mom, his great grandmother, but then, Matthew is a very loving guy, and he thinks he whole family is pretty great.

When Matthew was little…in his ninja days, I fully expected him to be a tough guy, who never showed much emotion, but then came the day that he walked in the door to my mom’s house, saw me sitting in the first chair he came to, and he walked right up to me and gave me a big hug. I was so surprised. It was just such a loving, sweet thing to do…not a tough guy move at all, but it was a Matthew move, as I have since found out.

To me it seemed like Matthew changed from tough guy to loving guy overnight. I’m sure that wasn’t the case, but I don’t see him every day…more like once a week or so. I suppose that in church there is just too much going on to notice the changes, but when he came into Mom’s living room, there were no distractions, and this sweet little boy simply acted on the feelings in his heart. His loving hug for me, his great aunt was such a precious act, and one that has stayed in my heart ever since. Little did he know that his actions that day brought joy into the heart of his work weary great aunt. And even if it meant little more than a hello hug to him, it made my entire day. How awesome that was.

Today, that sweet little boy turns 7 years old…also, unbelievable. I know that as he grows, he will become more and more loving, because it is simply in his nature. Happy birthday Matthew!! I love you very much sweet boy!! Have an awesome day!!

My daughters were born 11 months apart. When I went into the hospital to have Amy, Corrie stayed with my sister, Cheryl. Back then, you stayed 3 days in the hospital when you gave birth to a new baby, and that was if you didn’t have a C-Section, which I did not. Also, the little ones couldn’t come into the hospital then. A child had to be 13 years old…no exceptions. It was very hard on those young siblings, especially if they had not been away from their mom’s much. So, Corrie got to wave at me as I looked out the window of my room. Things are much better now, for all concerned.

When I was released from the hospital, we went straight to my sister’s house to pick up Corrie. For a minute, I thought she was mad at me, and maybe she was, but really she was just more interested in the new baby I brought her. She wanted to hold Amy immediately, and really didn’t want to ever give her back. I know that many kids have some jealousy issues when a new baby comes into the picture, but she did not. Corrie was convinced that Amy belonged to her, so just you deal with it!! Of course, if Amy cried…I could just have her back until she got herself calmed down.

The girls were best friends throughout their childhood, and still are today. They seldom fought, but when they did, I have to say, that little sister usually won. I remember Corrie coming out of the bedroom one day to say with tears running down her face, “Amy hit me!!!” I told her to hit her back, to which she screamed, “Nooooooooo!!” I don’t know if she just loved her little sister too much to ever hit her, or if she was totally scared of Amy, which wasn’t a bad plan either, since Amy is very feisty!!

Whatever little fights they had as little kids, really haven’t mattered much, either since their childhood, or during their childhood, because they really loved each other very much. Many babies aren’t too sure of having their older siblings holding them very much, but not Amy. She truly loved her big sister, as you can clearly see. Corrie was gentle and so loving with Amy, and that love was always returned to her in every way. You can just see it on their faces. They just seem to say, “I love my sister!!”

When my brother-in-law, Mike was dating my sister, Caryl, I think he found himself wondering what he had gotten himself into. The very first time he met all of us, we just started in on our normal teasing. I mean, any guy who was going to be a part of this family might just as well get used to being teased, because we love to tease. Mike was a little unsure of us at first, or maybe he was a little shy, I can’t say for sure, but it didn’t take him long to feel comfortable, and then his own teasing side came out to play with a gusto.

Over the years we have found Mike to be a great addition to our family. Yes, he has a great sense of humor, but he is also willing to pitch in whenever we need help with maintenance and building projects. He is very good at designing and building things.  We are very blessed to have husbands in our family who can take care of everything from the cars to the house.  Since joining the family, Mike has built an enclosed porch and deck at my mom’s house, as well as setting up sprinkler systems, and multiple repairs. The money saved by his talents alone is a lot. When we got Mike, you might say that he came with a lot of extras.

Caryl met Mike through his aunt, who was a patient of hers when she was working at the Wyoming Kidney Center, administering dialysis. Sometimes there are true match makers out there. She and Caryl got along so well, and one day she said you just have to meet my nephew. You two are perfect for each other. Although sceptical, Caryl agreed to meet Mike, and the rest…well, the rest is history, as they say.

Our family has been very blessed with the addition of Mike, and not just in the things he can do for us. Mike is a loving son-in-law and brother-in-law, and while he has a great sense of humor and can tease with the best of us, he has a softer side too. He is a kind man who has a giving nature. That is the best kind of person to add to a family…don’t you agree? Happy birthday Mike!! We love you!!

The other day, I wrote a story about my cousin, Elmer…Uncle Bud to his niece, JeanAnn and now, her children Mykenzie…Kenzie, as her mom calls her, and Ethan. That story has sparked another story…one that I think you will find very funny. I know I did when Elmer and JeanAnn told it to me.

Elmer enjoys taking JeanAnn and the kids out to the lake, where they go boating and swimming. They all have a great time. Now, the kids are always picking on each other. Kenzie especially loves to pick on her little brother, and Ethan, being the younger one, didn’t often get the upper hand, but that could be changing. Ethan is all boy, and if you have ever been around boys, you will know that they are full of mischief…in fact, sometimes, I think they spend hours dreaming up ways to pick on or get even with their sisters.

Ethan loves going to the lake, but he would much rather be in the boat or on the land or dock, because for some reason, at this age, he is afraid of the water. The kids are always wearing life jackets if they are going to get in very far, or in the boat, of course, and still, Ethan doesn’t like to be in much past his knees.

On this particular day, Kenzie was swimming near the dock, and Ethan decided that he had found a great way to get even with his sister. So Ethan was running back and forth on the dock with a cup of water, that he was doing his best to dump on his sister. Of course, a boy running on a dock with a cup of water is bound to spill plenty of it, so the dock got wet from all that water, and when Ethan was running along the edge of the dock, the inevitable happened. Ethan slipped right off the dock.

Now that may seem like it wouldn’t be funny, but I think you will agree that it is. When Ethan fell off the dock, he landed directly on top of his sister. No one was in any danger, because they both had life jackets on, but that really didn’t matter, because they were both screaming and crying like they were in the middle of a hurricane. Elmer said it was so funny to see Ethan get his just desserts for all his teasing.

Now, it’s true that Ethan had been caught in his own trap, but there was someone else who got caught too…JeanAnn. You see, JeanAnn was right beside Kenzie, and when Ethan fell in the water…on top of Kenzie, he also fell on top of JeanAnn. So with both kids screaming and crying, JeanAnn had the lovely job of trying to walk them up and back on the dock, but that proved a little difficult, since  Kenzie wouldn’t let go of the dock, and Ethan wouldn’t let go of Kenzie’s head. Obviously outnumbered, JeanAnn couldn’t pry them apart, and finally ended up throwing them both on the dock…at which point it was Mommy who was the last one dunked. Can’t you just picture it right now.

On Saturday, at a baby shower for her sister, I watched my niece, Chantel struggle with the fact that her daughter is going to be going to college in Montana, and it is a 10 hour drive, which will make weekend visits impossible. As the tears flowed, triggered by advise she was reading to her sister on raising kids, my heart just ached for her. The game was meant to be fun, but for Chantel, well, it just made her wish she could turn back the clock. She and her daughter have always been close and the thought of her moving so far away leaves an emptiness that can’t be filled. Yes, they will Skype and there may be a trip or two before the weather gets to where that is dangerous, and they will fly Siara home for Christmas, but that still leaves a lot of days without her daughter…her baby being in her everyday life.

That is a tough place to be, but unfortunately it is also one of the seasons of life. My thoughts went back to some of the seasons of life that have torn at my heart. Probably one of the first ones that I remember, and was when my sister, Cheryl who is Chantel’s mother was moving to New York. We were also faced with the fact that we would be able to see her, maybe once a year, and the days leading up to that move were filled with quite a few teary moments too. Then there came my sister Caryl’s move to San Diego, and while that move was easier in terms of the fact that we had been down this road before, it was still very hard. We are simply a family of people who stay close to home. We are all in Wyoming at this point, except one nephew, Allen, soon to be stationed in Japan for 2 years and one niece, Lindsay in college in South Dakota, and now Siara in Montana.  We just like to be close to each other.

I remembered my own seasons, which while not as hard were nevertheless, hard at the time. Corrie getting married. That first child leaving home moment is a hard one, even when they don’t move away, and then there is a semi-funny moment, when Amy went to pre-school, and was so excited that she left me at the door. I was the whiny one who had to go in the room and kiss her goodbye, hahaha.

My thoughts wandered back to Chantel, and her breaking heart, and while I knew that this moment felt to her like she would never feel better, I knew also, that she would. The sting of those feelings eases with time, and while a dull, lonely ache hurts in its own way, it is easier than the intense pain of the moment. My guess is that Siara, like most of our family, will return to Casper after college, and the season for leaving will be for Chantel, a distant memory.

When children are born a number of years apart, the older children can end up having babies at almost the same time as their parents. Such was the case with my mother-in-law and her younger sisters. Her sister, Linda was born 15 years after she was, and Margee was born 18 years after she was. My mother-in-law married my father-in-law just 6 months later, and when their first child, Marlyce was born, Margee was just 1 1/2 years old. Marlyce was more like a little sister than a niece, and since she was so little, Margee didn’t know what a niece was anyway. All she saw was a new friend.

With each additional child, new playmates arrived, and before they knew it, there were 5 of them playimg together. By this time, of course, my mother-in-law’s sisters were old enough to know that the younger kids were nieces and nephew, and not friends. Still, the years spent playing with their nieces and nephew were years where friends were in abundance.

My mom’s family had much the same situation, except that it wasn’t the years between children that caused the closeness of the younger children to nieces and nephews, but rather the number of children in the family. My Aunt Sandy was just 3 years old when her sister, my Aunt Evelyn had her first child, Susie, and two more children would arrive by the time my Aunt Sandy was 5 years old. Aunt Sandy tells me that she never really felt like she was the youngest child, since there were so many nieces and nephews, and her sisters, my Aunt Bonnie and Aunt Dixie weren’t much older than Aunt Sandy, so they lived the story she did.

Having nieces and nephews that are very close in age to you can be a fun thing, because you always know you have friends to play with. I suppose it can be annoying too, because they can be just like a kid sister or brother…always under foot, so I’m sure there were times when the aunts just wished those kids would go home. They can also be great fun. They look up to you, which can be very different from what many kids experience. Either way, you will always have friends in abundance.

In the Fall of 1957 or 1958, my family was living in Superior, Wisconsin, which is where my dad’s family lived. I was just a toddler at the time, and our family had been visiting Casper, Wyoming, where Mom’s family lived. My grandma and my Aunt Sandy were to accompany us back to Wisconsin for a visit, and then they would take the bus home again. The amount of room in the car limited the number of people who could come to two, and my Aunt Sandy felt very blessed to be chosen, as a trip to Canada was in the plans. It was to be the only time Aunt Sandy traveled outside the United States…so far, anyway.

Aunt Sandy tells me that one of the most wonderful memories she has of the trip is the fall colors in the trees. Wyoming gets pretty much one color change in the fall…green to yellow. The reds you see in the Midwest and East are pretty foreign in Wyoming. The drive was very exciting for a young girl of 12 or 13 years.

The Canadian part of the trip would also be filled with lovely fall colors, and would take them to Port Arthur to stay the night. They drove along the north shore of Lake Superior, which is a beautiful drive, as I can attest. It was always a favorite of my parents, and of course, most people who live around Lake Superior. The area is filled with trees, and magnificent views of the lake, so it is always a very special treat.

At some point in touring of the area, we stopped to look around, and Aunt Sandy leaned up against a fence post. Not knowing the problems that can occur when you put a wooden post in the ground for a long period of time in a climate that is humid, and ground water is plentiful, poor Aunt Sandy had no idea that leaning against such a post was a bad idea. The post immediately broke, of course, and Aunt Sandy found herself laying in the sand. Big sisters being with they are with their kid sisters, my mother began laughing hysterically about her little sister “throwing herself in the sand”. Thankfully Aunt Sandy wasn’t bothered by her sister’s teasing, or maybe it was just that she was used to teasing, being the youngest of 9 children. Nevertheless, Mom laughed, and Aunt Sandy picked herself up, and blew off the laughter good naturedly. I guess the trip was too much fun to worry about such trivial things.

All too soon, the trip came to an end. But there was still one adventure to come. Grandma and Aunt Sandy were going to be going home on the bus. Now, as we all know, bus trips are very long, with stops in just about every Podunk town on the map, but to a young girl of 12 or 13 years, it was still a very exciting trip, and one that she has never forgotten in all these years. I could tell, as I was talking to her about her memories of the trip, that they are still very much alive and well in her memory.

On Thursday nights, I spend the evening with my mom and my sister, Cheryl. We watch movies, have dinner, and just hang out. It is our girls night. Tonight we went to a restaurant called Hayden’s Place, which those of you who know Casper, might know as The Kopper Kettle, or The Pink Kitchen. As we were having our dinner, we were reminiscing  about the many times we had been there for dinner through the years.

My earliest memory of The Pink Kitchen, was when Mom and Dad would take us there for dinner as kids. I always ordered the Hot Roast Beef Sandwich…always, even though I had always pre-determined to order something different. I can’t tell you why I always ordered it, or why I thought I might want something different, it was just my memory of every dinner we spent there. And I still love Hot Roast Beef Sandwiches to this day.

By the time Bob and I were dating, the name had changed to The Kopper Kettle, and we occasionally went there for dinner. One summer day we went there to eat, and there was something wrong with Bob’s car. He opened the hood, and was working on something…not sure what now, but as he laid his screw driver on the cross bar of the car, it slipped off, and stabbed the radiator. How it managed to do that, I’ll never know, but he couldn’t believe it. What are the odds…right? He just stood there looking the antifreeze flowing out of the radiator onto the ground for a minute in shock. Then he went in and made a phone call to get his dad to come and help him fix it.

Tonight’s dinner was the first time I had eaten there in many years, but the food was still just as good, and I finally ordered something different…a smothered Burrito with Green Chili…quite a change from my Hot Roast Beef Sandwich days. And to tell you the truth, it felt a little strange when I thought about it.

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