Genealogy
When we look back over the years of a family history, we have a tendency to look at the family icons…the ones who, at least in our generation started it all. Often all of the great grandparents have passed on now, and so it is the grandparents that you look at, thinking, “Look what you two started!” From two people, this family has multiplied to seventy one people, with one more due in late September, and of course, if you look back to great grandparents, the number goes up exponentially. Love starts a marriage, and then adds children, who grow up, marry and have children, who continue the whole process. I have to wonder if my husband, Bob’s grandparents, Robert and Nettie (Noyes) Knox had any idea how much their family would grow over the years. I don’t think any married couple really does, until they look back at their children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren…often in awe of how many there are.
Grandma and Grandpa Knox would be celebrating their 85th anniversary this year, if they were still alive, but of course, they are not, so we will remember it for them. Grandpa Knox passed away on December 17, 1985, at the age of 76 years, and Grandma Knox passed away on July 29, 1990, at the age of 82. They celebrated 56 anniversaries together before Grandpa’s passing, and they experienced many different eras in our nations history. They lived through the Great Depression…a time which would bring them to very much distrust the banking system. Grandma often carried large sums of money in her purse, much to the concern of her family, but no one ever robbed her, so I guess the money was just as safe with her as it was the bank. They farmed the land they lived on, raised sheep and cattle on the ranches they worked on, and helped out their oldest daughter, Joann on her place in Casper, Wyoming, while living on the land they had too. They lived a full life surrounded by their grandchildren and great grandchildren, two of whom would be born on their respective 
birthdays. Life doesn’t get much better than that.
When they left us, it was a loss that was felt very deeply throughout the family. They had always been there, and it was inconceivable to think that they were actually gone. It felt like they were taken too soon, even though they lived longer than many people had the chance to do. We miss them still…especially their granddaughters, Corrie and Machelle, who were born on their birthdays. Today would have been Grandma and Grandpa Knox’s 85th anniversary. We wish they were still here to celebrate it. We love and miss you both.
Over the years, I have seen many changes in my nephew, Garrett. He has gone from being the goofy brother, picking on his sisters to being a grown man, schooled and now starting a new job in his chosen career. There have been a lot of changes in Garrett over the years, and he has a wide range of activities that he enjoys. Everything from sports to hunting…Garrett is there. Of course, there is always the Garrett Standby…little kids. Garrett absolutely loves little kids. He plays with them, teases them, and loves to get his picture taken with them. I think he will make a great dad someday.
Recently, Garrett has been hanging around a special girl, Kayla Smiley, and I don’t know how serious they are right now, but he seems very content in her company. The almost funny thing is that she lives right next door to my mom, Garret’s grandma, so like it or not, she keeps close tabs on his comings and goings from Kayla’s house. Garrett doesn’t seem to mind though, he just stops by Mom’s house at some point…most of the time anyway. That satisfies her, and so I think she kind of likes the fact that he is around a little bit more. I guess we will see where things go from there.
May brought about Garrett’s graduation from college, with an Associates Degree and a Welder Certification…along with a big change in his work status. He landed a great job at Nalco Fab Tech as a welder. He reminds a lot of us, especially his mom, my sister, Alena Spencer Stevens of our dad, Allen Lewis Spencer, in that both were accomplished welders, who made a great living in that field. I think my dad would be real proud to have Garrett following in his footsteps, and I know that having another welder in the family will be a great asset. Somehow, it seems that every family has need of a welder. There always seems to be things that need welded, and not everyone has that skill, so I guess you know what place you will hold in the Family Go To List, Garrett!
Of course, Garrett has many other skills that put him on the Family Go To List. He is quite 
handy when it comes to construction, and so is a great hand to have around when his grandma comes up with a new project around her house. One thing about having people skilled in construction, welding, photography, floral arranging, insurance, and so many other areas, is that, while you may pay for the work done, it is always quite a bit cheaper than it would have been otherwise. And while some of us can’t make it cheaper, we can give expert advise. I think everyone needs a Family Go To List, and I know that for ours, Garrett just became a key member. Today is Garrett’s birthday. Happy birthday Garrett!! We are very proud of your accomplishments!! Have a great day!! We Love you!!
My aunt, Virginia Byer Beadle was always a beautiful girl, with lovely hair…and this was according to anyone who knew her. From the time she was a young girl and on into her golden years, that fact has not changed. It was quite likely the first thing people noticed about her. Her hair, at least until it turned gray, was a jet black color, and always in curls. I don’t know if her curls are natural or not, but I don’t remember ever seeing her without them.
One time, her sister, my Aunt Evelyn, and Aunt Virginia were supposed to clean up the house, but Aunt Evelyn had been babysitting the night before…all night, and the baby was fussy. As is typical with siblings when they are young, Aunt Virginia wanted to know why her sister was sleeping rather than helping. When she was told that Aunt Evelyn had babysat all night, Aunt Virginia said, “So then if I have a job, you are saying that I won’t have to do housework either?” Now I have to assume that it was Grandma that she was talking to, but the answer was, “No, you wouldn’t.” I don’t know what they expected to happen, but needless to say, Aunt Virginia went out and got herself a job, and she had one from that day on.
When the time came for Aunt Virginia to learn to drive…well, the family got a real education on just how you didn’t want to drive. It seems that every time Aunt Virginia backed out of a parking spot, she would neglect to look behind her and in the end hit probably half a dozen 
cars. My mom didn’t say how much damage or how the cars got fixed, or even if the police were called, but she did say that every time Aunt Virginia got behind the wheel the rest of the block cringed. Personally, I wouldn’t park behind her, but that’s just me. Eventually she figured it out, and I haven’t heard that she is such a bad driver now.
After Aunt Virginia got married and moved to her apartment, my mom took to going over and spending the night off and on. In fact, she stayed there quite a lot. It would be those nights spent at her sister’s apartment that would precipitate the marriage of my parents, because my dad was a friend of Aunt Virginia and Uncle Jim’s. For her part in our parents meeting, my sisters and I will always be grateful. Today is Aunt Virginia’s 84th birthday. Happy birthday Aunt Virginia!! Have a wonderful day!! We love you!!
After spending some time in the early spring of 1940, working for the railroad in the car repair department, my uncle, William Malrose Spencer, decided the work was not for him. He quit the job that paid him 38¢ an hour…an amount that made every kid in Holyoke, Minnesota green with envy. With some of the money he had made, he purchased a 1934 Plymouth for which he paid $65.00. I’m sure that was a lot of money to pay for a car back then, but today, we would not get much of a car for $65.00. Nevertheless, in 1940, $65.00 bought my uncle a car that was only six years old, and that is truly amazing. No wonder the kids in town were envious of my Uncle Bill’s great job. At 18 years of age, 
he must have seemed quite grown up.
After leaving the railroad, Uncle Bill returned home in early June…just in time to make hay, which took most of the month of June. Toward the end of June, Uncle Bill decided to head out to North Dakota to work in the harvest fields out there. Although he was only 16 years of age, my dad, Allen Lewis Spencer and their friend, Bob Croft decided to go along. So, they loaded up in Uncle Bill’s 1934 Plymouth and headed out. Their plan was to work in different harvest ready fields along their way.
This all seems like an easy money scheme, until you think about the fact that this trip was made during the pre-combine years. At that time, the grain was cut with a binder and then hauled to the threshing machine, with horses and wagons. Of course, all this was 
done in the heat of the day, and the men didn’t really wear tank tops and shorts back then. They simply sweated it out. The work was not easy either. There was a lot of bending, lifting, loading, and unloading. They worked liked dogs from sun up to sun down, but that was just the way things were done back then.
The guys spent the rest of that summer in the fields of North Dakota, before returning home when the harvest was done. Uncle Bill says that the trip was quite the adventure, but they made a little money while they were at it, so it was worth it in the end.
These days, a trip to the store is a minor part of the day, even if it is a weekly or monthly trip to buy groceries, but it wasn’t always so. Many, and in fact probably the majority of people live right in town now, so it’s easy to run to the store for forgotten milk or bread, but when people live in the country it is a little bit more of a big, planned out trip. In the old west, it was even more than that…it was an all day event…and a lot of people didn’t go to town very often. They bought what they needed in quantity, and didn’t go back in for a while.
Now with the invention of the automobile, people travel a lot of places, not just into town. These days people drive all over the country, and into Canada and even Mexico sometimes. We have become a nation, and indeed world, of people on the move. In the old west, people had to plan trips around the country over the course of several months, because there was a lot of preparation needed to make such a trip. There weren’t hotels and restaurants all over the place to stay and eat at, so food had to be brought along, and cooked over a campfire when they stopped. It’s no wonder they didn’t go places very often. It all just took too long to make it a casual event.
These days, I can’t imagine people being patient enough take the time to get where they need to go in a wagon, pulled by horses…at least not most people. And I’m sure that even in the old west, people often wished there was a faster way. In fact, that is probably how the automobile 
got invented in the first place. Inventions come for someone seeing a need, and in our world, there is a definite need for automobiles.
Nowadays, we have every kind of vehicle imaginable to get us where we need to go. There are sports cars for the fun ride, around town or to the store, pickups for those big jobs, vans for hauling lots of people, and SUV’s the ability to take a lot of things with you and a lot of people too. They come in every color and size to suit each drivers personal taste. I know there are still people who use a horse and buggy, but this girl is a child of the modern age, and I’ll stick to my sporty car…over a wagon any day.
Every time I saw, Bob’s grandmother, Vina Leary Hein and her second husband, Walter Hein, they were always happy and fun people to be around. They loved company…especially their grandchildren. Nevertheless, they were hard working people, who rarely took a vacation…or even a day off. The owned a ranch, and there was always too much to do to be away for very long. The only bad thing about all that they had to do, is that they didn’t have as much time to spend with company as they might have liked. Nevertheless, when company was visiting, the evenings belongs to them and what usually went on in the evenings when company was visiting…cards, or at least that was what the evenings were like when Bob and I would visit.
Sometimes, I wondered how Grandma and Walt ever got together. They were two very different people. Walt would have never left the ranch, and wished Grandma wouldn’t either. For her part, she would really rather not play cards at all, and yet she finds herself roped into it. She wanted to be able to go to town and to visit her family, and he didn’t. It seemed like the odd couple sometimes, and yet, there was something that glued this couple together…love and friendship. They were two very different people who meshed perfectly…even if no one else could see why.
One of the happiest days I saw for them was their 50th Anniversary party. They were so happy. Walt was even open to leaving the ranch and the work for the day. He and Grandma looked so happy, and it was such a fun day. They socialized, danced, and enjoyed the foods. They smiled constantly. I could suddenly see that despite the fact that they seemed so opposite, they were nevertheless a perfect match. And whether we could see what it was that drew them together or not, after 50 years, it was obviously there.
As happy as I was for them, the day came when I felt such an aching for Walt. That was the day Grandma passed away. He seemed so broken, so horribly sad, and suddenly almost like a little lost child. It just broke my heart. It became so obvious to me, that Walt loved Grandma with all his being. I wasn’t sure he could live without her, and I suppose he might not have been able to, except that dementia had set in for him, and the foggy memory of her passing, made it easier to bear. Walt lived another six years before he passed away. While they have been gone 16 and 10 years respectively, I still find it very hard to believe that they are gone. Today would have been their 75th Anniversary. I’m sorry that they weren’t here to see this day, but then Grandma would have been 105, and Walt would have been 108, so it seems very unlikely that they would have been here today anyway.
Today would have been my mother-in-law’s 65th anniversary, and in her mind it would still be so. She has no idea she is a widow. She has no idea that the love of her life…the man she has known since she was just a little baby, and with whom she shared a crib sometimes…has been gone for over a year now. That is the side of Alzheimer’s Disease that I think is merciful. While she doesn’t remember the things that happened a few minutes ago, or even a few years ago, and she doesn’t always remember our names, she also doesn’t remember that my father-in-law passed away on May 5, 2013. To her, he is visiting the neighbors, working, or out in the garage. I’m glad that is the case. She feels no grief and she doesn’t miss him…because to her, he is still here. She sees him everywhere. When she sees a man in a plaid shirt, she thinks it’s Dad, because he loved those plaid flannel shirts. I wouldn’t wish for her to remember Dad’s passing…it’s just too hard. We can play along. When she asks where Dad is, I tell her that he is in the garage, at Walmart, or at the neighbors. It satisfies her. She also sees Dad in her sons, Bob and Ron, her grandsons, and even in some of the men in the nursing home. We play along. At first it was hard, but the guys are used to it now.
This anniversary, that would have been a landmark anniversary for them, had Dad still been with us, is a bit sad for us…the children, in-laws, and grandchildren left behind, after Dad’s passing. It is always such a cool thing, especially these days, when someone makes one of these landmark anniversaries, because so many marriages don’t last. But theirs beat the odds. They had the real thing…love, and that made all the difference. It’s what keeps a marriage 
together through good times and bad.
Dad was always the bread winner, and Mom was always the homemaker. Together, they raised six children. She cooked, baked, canned, and kept the home and kids in order. He took care of the outdoor things like shoveling the walk, mowing the lawn, working on the cars, and any building that needed to be done. They were a team…and then half of the team was suddenly gone after a little under 64 years of marriage. To us, their family, it seemed too impossible to be true, but to Mom, it simply wasn’t true. To her…he is still here, and will be for as long as she is. It’s the merciful part of Alzheimer’s Disease.
They say that when a girl picks a man to be her husband, she often picks a man who is much like her dad. It isn’t maybe a conscious thing, but it seems to be a fact anyway. Maybe it’s because for a girl, their dad always makes them feel like a princess, so it can be hard to move away from that when you get married. I think to a degree, most girls pick someone similar to their dads, because that is the first male influence on their lives, but it would sure seem that, my sister, Alena Spencer Stevens came the closest of any I’ve ever seen when she married her husband, Mike Stevens. I don’t know if she saw the 
similarities back then, but I doubt it, because I don’t think most girls choose a husband based on that similarity, but she definitely sees it now. Mike is a lot like Dad in his work ethic, the type of work he can do, and in his mannerisms and temperament. They are even similar in their looks!
Alena loves to do many of the recreational things that our dad loved to do, such as camping and fishing, and she loves to sit around a campfire, so much so, that she and Mike were the first in our family to buy a backyard fire pit. That is very Dad like. I suppose that being Dad like is one of the main reasons that Alena would choose a man who is much like Dad to be her husband, because that is the type of person she is most comfortable with.
Alena is a very soft hearted person, and like Dad, she doesn’t like to see people being picked on, unless of course, it is in fun, and then she would prefer to be the one doing the picking, rather than being picked on…but then, wouldn’t we all. Alena is pretty good at playing practical jokes too. In fact, she has been since she was a little girl. She pulled enough pranks on the rest of us over the years, that we learned to be pretty watchful of her. It was the best way to defend yourself. Her favorites were, of course, the ones where the rest of us ended up scared, so she could laugh at us for being a chicken…I wonder why, when we thought someone was breaking in when Mom and Dad weren’t home and it was midnight or so. Good job Alena!! Today is Alena’s birthday. Happy birthday Alena!! Have a great day!! We love you!!
There is something about naming a child after yourself, or your parent, that appeals to a lot of people. My dad was named after his dad, and my Uncle Bill Spencer was named after his grandfather. Sometimes it’s the first name that came from the parent, sometimes it’s the middle name, or sometimes it’s both. For my Uncle George Hushman, who didn’t know his own family until much later in life, life presented him with a perfect plan for a namesake. When Uncle George married my Aunt Evelyn Byer, he became the second George in the family, because his father-in-law, my Grandpa George Byer was the first George. Since Uncle George didn’t know his family at the time he married my Aunt Evelyn, he pretty much adopted her family as his family.
I don’t know if their first son, George was named after Uncle George or Grandpa George, or if it was both, but I kind of think it might have been both. Then, when he had a son, my cousin George, named his son George. Suddenly there were four Georges in the family. Of course, with the four Georges came the need for nicknames to distinguish between the three and then the four of them. My cousin George became Bub, and his son, my cousin once removed, George became Hush. It seems like anytime a child is named after a parent, nicknames are inevitable, but the parent truly still has a namesake. I’m sure that my grandfather felt honored to have so many named after him, even if he shared that with Uncle George, and I think they both liked the whole thing enough to want a picture of the four Georges as a keepsake. And now, there is a fifth George, with the addition of Tuff.
My husband, Bob was named after his grandfather, Bob Knox, and so my Bob became Bobby to his family…but that was not allowed by his wife, mind you. I can’t say as I blame him, really, I mean it is a little juvenile when you think about it. My nephew, Rob was also named after his dad, and we all called him Robbie, but his wife, Dustie was not allow to use that either…again, too juvenile. Naming a child after someone else can be a little problematic for the one being named, when they grow up and the name seems far too young for them.
For my Uncle Bill, being named after his grandfather was the greatest honor that could have been bestowed on him. He wore the name with pride…often mentioning the connection in the family history along with his signature, as a way of honoring his grandfather. I think that is what having or being a namesake is all about. It is a show of love for the person who had the name first, as well as for the child named after someone very dear to their parents. Maybe it began as a tradition, but even then, it is a show of honor, love, and great respect, and it is a cool thing to do.
Funerals so often become a type of sad family reunion. Family and friends, who have drifted apart, now come together to say goodbye to a loved one or friend, and wish there had been a just a bit more time to reconnect, before the passing of their loved ones. Everyone lives a busy life, so time always seems to slip away, and before they know it, someone they cared about very much is gone. No one ever means to let the time between visits slip away, and yet I can name two grandfathers right now, who moved away from the state their parents lived in, and it ended up being the last time they saw their fathers alive. In those days, there were more situations in which the children moved away, never to see their family again. The distances were just too far to travel back and forth, like we do these days. Those parting goodbyes were much more sad, because they were real goodbyes.
When my great grandfather, William Malrose Spencer left Iowa with his family to move to Wisconsin, he had no idea that it would be the last time he saw his dad, Allen Spencer. Obviously, anytime we leave a person’s presence, it could be the last time we see them, but it is far less common when living in the same town than living several states away.
It looks to me like my great grandmother my great grandmother, Henriette Hensel, went back to Germany only once after she immigrated to America with her sister and her brother-in-law. Her husband, my great grandfather, Carl Schumacher went back to visit, but taking the entire family again would have been quite costly, so he went alone. I’m sure they were very happy to see him and hear about their life, but it was nevertheless, most likely the last time. I’m sure my great grandmother was sorry she couldn’t go, but by then she has Rheumatoid Arthritis, and travel was difficult.
Even in this day and age, of easy travel, a move far away could prove to be the last time a family gets to see the departing loved one, but thankfully with things like the telephone, Skype, FaceTime, email, and Facebook, staying connected isn’t as difficult as it used to be. It doesn’t replace the reunions, because one on one time spent with loved ones is so important, but it is better than the way things used to be. Somehow, a letter from home is not quite the same as being able to see them in person, or at least via Skype or FaceTime.
