large family
Every year that my sister-in-law has been in Heaven seems more and more impossible to me. Marlyce Schulenberg left us on August 13, 1989, meaning that she has been in Heaven for 34 years now. Marlyce was 39 years old when she went home. I still miss my sweet sister-in-law every day. She brought so much joy into our lives, because while she was developmentally disabled, she had such a great capacity for giving and for bringing happiness to or lives. Marlyce was fairly high functioning, in that while she was unable to live on her own, due to her mental age, she was well able to do things like knitting and baking, and it gave her such great pleasure to see the faces of those people to whom she bestowed her gifts.
Marlyce, being a part of a large family of six children, was faced with the teasing of her siblings. They weren’t cruel, they just all picked on each other, and some handled it a little better than others. Marlyce kind of liked some of the teasing, especially about supposed boyfriends, which she may or may not have had at the time. She would grin and maybe even blush a little, but other types of teasing just made her mad. And her siblings, Debbie Cook, Bob Schulenberg, Jennifer Parmely, Brenda Schulenberg, and Ron Schulenberg knew just which type of teasing was which…much to the irritation of their parents, Walt and Joann Schulenberg, who would shut it down when they had had enough. You have to understand too, that Marlyce was the oldest, so all this teasing was going on among children, and if you have had siblings, you probably know all about teasing. Nevertheless, the siblings all loved Marlyce very much. I joined the family when Marlyce was 25 years old, and I really never took part in the teasing, so I got to be the loved sister-in-law. It’s not that I was against teasing, but rather that she was always so sweet to me that I didn’t have the heart to tease her…even in fun.
Mom and Dad always worried about what would happen to Marlyce when they were gone. She couldn’t live 
alone, and I’m sure they wondered if the siblings would take care of her. Of course, we would have. It was just understood, but it would have been a lifestyle change for the sibling she lived with. In the end, of course, it didn’t matter, because she went home before Mom and Dad did. I don’t think any of us were thinking about that the day she left, we just knew that everything had changed, and we would always miss her very much. Marlyce would have been 73 years old today. Happy birthday in Heaven, Marlyce. We love and miss you very much.
My aunt, Sandy Patton is the youngest of my grandparents, George and Hattie Byer’s children. Life for a youngest child is normally very different than that of the oldest child…especially in a large family. My grandparents had nine children. From almost the time Aunt Sandy was three years old, basically from the time her first memory, there were babies in the household. The older children had similar experiences, but it’s a bit different when the babies are younger siblings…or maybe it isn’t. The nieces and nephews were there a lot, but they did go home too. Nevertheless, as a young girl, she always had playmates…at least when she could play.
Aunt Sandy was a sickly child, and often missed school, so in reality, her best friend was her mom. They spent a lot of time together while her mom care for her ailing daughter. When a child is sick, they need bedrest, but when they aren’t sleeping…that can make for long boring days. So, to ease the boredom, Grandma Byer told her daughter stories of the past…Grandma’s past and Aunt Sandy’s heritage. Some of the stories were about 
Grandma’s childhood years, and others were about her ancestors. Aunt Sandy learned about the Cowboys and Indians, the lives of farmers and homesteaders, early automobiles, and about Aunt Sandy’s older siblings’ antics. When she wasn’t sick, Aunt Sandy had to take on the job of catching up on her studies. I don’t imagine that was fun, and I would think that there were many times when Aunt Sandy, thought about quitting school, but she didn’t…and maybe Grandma wouldn’t have let her do that. Whether Aunt Sandy liked school or not really made no difference, because if there was one subject she did like history. She loved hearing about the past, probably because her mom made it so real to her…almost like she was right there.
Aunt Sandy still loves hearing about family today, and really enjoys hearing about all the new additions, and the exciting things everyone is doing. She is the keeper of traditions, which stands to reason, since she is the youngest. It seems like tradition always falls to the youngest child eventually…at least until they pass the baton 
to the next generation. Sometimes it’s hard to pass that baton, because you never know if there will be a child of the next generation who is willing to pick that baton up and run with it. It was the hope of her parents, my grandparents that we always find a way to keep the family as close as possible. Aunt Sandy tried her best, and hopefully now, we will continue to try our best. Today is Aunt Sandy’s 77th birthday. Happy birthday Aunt Sandy!! Have a great day!! We love you!!
My Aunt Sandy Pattan is the family history guru in the Byer family. As a child, she was sickly, and so spent a lot of time in bed. Being home from school, just Aunt Sandy and her mom, my grandma, Hattie Byer, gave them much time to sit and talk. Remember that while television did exist, it was not common in most homes, and I don’t believe that my grandparents had one when the kids were growing up. There were too many other things that the family needed in the home, like food, for example. Video games were not invented yet, so Aunt Sandy was left with books, and Grandma’s stories to entertain her through the hours over recuperating from this cold or that flu, which seemed to attack her often.
My grandmother grew up in the early 1900s, and by the time Aunt Sandy came along in 1945, Grandma and Grandpa had eight other children. Aunt Sandy would be their last child. While Grandma and Grandpa disagreed on her name, Grandpa honored their decision to let the older kids decide between Sonya and Sandra. He was an honorable man. Grandma told her youngest child about a time when the Indians being around, wasn’t all that unusual. Many of her stories might have come from her parents and in-laws tales, but she remembered them all, and passed them on to her daughter, who absorbed them like a sponge. I recall my history classes in school, filled with dry boring date memorization, but when history is told like the story it is, it is amazingly interesting. That’s how Aunt Sandy got to learn history…or shall I say really learn history. When you think about an Indian who spends hours sitting on his horse looking at the wife of a respected friend, because he thought she was beautiful, and still never disrespecting her, because she was the wife of his friend, and you know that the woman was your grandmother, you can begin to relate to history as a story.
Aunt Sandy has never lost her love of history, and especially family history. Her parents came from large families and then went on to have a large family, so there was a lot of interesting activities. From the days of gunslingers to the first planes, cars, television, and so many other inventions, her parents had seen it all…or at least heard all about it. The events of history are so amazing, that the current days seem to pale in comparison. I now that my Aunt Sandy loved hearing all the family stories as they were passed down from mother to daughter, and I’m sure that she thought her family was the most amazing on in history, but the reality is that they were probably just a normal, every day, run of the mill families, living their life in the normal way for the times. It’s just that to the hearer of the story of history, it is so far back in time, and so unusual compared to today’s world, that it seems almost far-fetched, except that it isn’t. It’s the true story of history, and like Aunt Sandy, I will always be grateful to be the one the stories are told to. Today is Aunt Sandy’s birthday. Happy birthday Aunt Sandy!! Have a great day!! We love you!!
