daughter
My niece, Michelle Stevens has, in her mother’s words, always been a character. If she wasn’t up to one thing, she was up to another. Michelle is in college working toward a teaching degree. She plans to be an art teacher. I think that might have been why she dreamed so many things up in her lifetime…even as a small child, she imagined things quite different than a non-artist might.
When Michelle was about 2 1/2, my sister, Alena Stevens, who is Michelle’s mom, put her down for a rare nap. Michelle was one of those kids who didn’t like to sleep at night, if she had a nap during the day. Nevertheless, since Alena was pregnant with Michelle’s brother, Garrett, and pretty close to full term, with an very active 2 1/2 year daughter, she was exhausted and in need of a nap. The plan was to put Michelle down for a nap, and take one herself, and it was working out quite well too. Then, Michelle woke up and came out of her room. As usual, she yelled out, “Mom!” Alena didn’t answer right away, because she just assumed that Michelle would come into 
the bedroom. But, Michelle didn’t come into the bedroom, and then Alena heard her trying to comfort herself by saying, “She be right back” in a pretty shaky, almost crying voice…”She be right back.” Alena immediately called out, “Michelle, I’m in the bedroom.” Michelle ran into the bedroom and jumped up on the bed. Alena cuddled with her and told her that I would never leave her alone…thinking sadly to herself that this must be how abandoned children feel.
Of course, most Michelle stories aren’t a mix of sad and funny. There was a funny incident in Sunday School, when they made a clock as a project. The clock face said “Jesus has time for…” The child was supposed to write their name in the space. For some strange reason, Michelle wrote her name as EMOP. Alena and her husband, Mike Stevens thought it was so funny that the clock hung on their refrigerator for a year. That name stuck, and they still call her EMOP sometimes, even though she is 27 years old. I have to wonder what she was thinking when she wrote EMOP, because she knew how to write her name by then.
Kids say the funniest things, and they don’t think about what they are saying, they just 
say what’s on their mind. Alena was video taping Michelle one time as she was singing the alphabet. Michelle was only about 2, and like all little ones, she got stuck on one of the letters. Since she was taping this and she wanted it to be perfect, Alena whispered the letter to Michelle, so as not to ruin the video. Well, Michelle understood about whispering, but not necessarily the whispering was supposed to be speaking really quietly. So she whispered back really loudly, “What Mom? What’d ya say?” Of course, all this was being recorded, and it looked so funny on the video. Needless to say, this…like the other stories here are all time favorites of Alena’s. They are the treasures of a child’s life. Today is Michelle’s birthday. Thanks, Michelle, for giving us something to smile about today. Happy birthday Michelle!! Have a great day!! We love you!!
For every girl named Amy, there comes a time when their name is butchered in one of the sweetest ways possible. It happens when a small child tries to say their name. I don’t quite understand why such a simple name is so hard for little ones to learn to say correctly. Nevertheless, the name Amy always seems to change to Mamie when said by a little one who is learning to talk. This has been something that my daughter, Amy Royce has had the pleasure of enjoying all her life. I suppose some people wouldn’t think it cute to have their name messed up in such a way, but we have always thought it to be really cute, and quite precious for our Amy to be called Mamie. It was always said by a child who dearly loved Amy, and that made the name quite endearing. And it was always fun to laugh about it, causing it to be a nickname that even the adults used with her sometimes.
Because of how much we loved the nickname, Mamie for our daughter, I found myself smiling when I heard what my cousin Raylynn Williams had named her daughter. The name was actually handed down from her husband’s grandmother, but nevertheless, there was now a Mayme whose name was not being mispronounced by the little children around her. As names go, it is a bit unusual, but then a lot of people prefer the unusual when it comes to naming their children, myself and my daughter Amy included.
I found myself taken back in time just over four years ago, when I heard what my cousin had named her precious little girl. The name would be one that would take me back every time I heard it…or even saw Mayme. How odd it seems, to have two children with names that, in reality, are not the same, but we can feel a sameness nevertheless. It isn’t always sameness that connects us, you see. Sometimes, it can be our differences that make us the same. While Amy and Mayme are totally different names, to hear a small child say them, would sound exactly the same. Who would expect that a shorter name that is totally different, would be pronounced the same when it comes to little kids. Mayme is a sweet little girl, with a beautiful smile, who is a little bit shy around people she doesn’t know well, But once she knows you are ok, based on being cleared by her parents, of course. Her face will light up with her smile. She is the answer to her parents prayers for a daughter, and the apple of their eyes. Her brothers are very protective of their little sister, as brothers tend to be…especially when the sister is the youngest, like Mayme is.
I can’t say that Amy and Mayme are alike in very many ways, in all reality, because Amy is a grown woman, and Mayme is a little girl. So much can change as each moves on in their life. Amy has always been a little shy, and I think Mayme is too, but that could change as she grows up…or it could stay the same. We will see. They may end up becoming completely different people, but one thing they will always have in common is their name…in a way anyway. Mayme will always be Mayme, even when her name is said by a little child, and Amy will always be Amy. But, Amy will also always be Mamie too, because there will always be little kids who will love Amy and will learn her name early, even if they do mispronounce it.
As often happens with little girls who are the first born, my niece, Jessi Sawdon was…well, a little bit bossy. She thought, from the very beginning, that she was as much in charge as her parents were. She was independent, she was three…and she was going on twenty. In the very early years of Jessi’s life, her mother discovered that she was going to be a bit of a challenge. When told to do things, Jessi would often argue with her parents. Since her dad worked, and her mom did not, it was usually her mom, my sister, Allyn Hadlock who found herself on the losing side of an argument with a stubborn three year old. When their child is argumentative, most parents try to use creative ways to get around the problem…because, lets face it, no one really likes to spank their child, and my sister is pretty soft hearted anyway. After trying everything from reasoning with Jessi, to arguing back with Jessi, Allyn finally decided to try a little bit different approach. The results were comical.
The next time the arguing started over a task Jessi was asked to perform, such as picking up her toys, Allyn finally said, “I’m the mom…you’re the baby.” Well she quickly found out just how clever and quick her little girl was, when Jessi began to argue with that…saying, “I’n da mom!!” Allyn quickly answered, “No, I’m the mom.” That argument only fueled the fire more, and Jessi said, a little more forcefully this time, “No, I’n da mom!!” 
Obviously this strategy was getting them nowhere. I mean, what do you say to that. You can argue back and forth all day, but the toys are still going to be on the floor…and Jessi always had a mind of her own, so she would continue to argue if necessary. And to add to the problem, Allyn was having a very hard time keeping a straight face. Jessi was so serious about all this. I really think she thought this was something that could be negotiated…like being the mom was an elected office, and she was going to beat the incumbent on this election.
Through the years some things have changed, but not everything. Jessi is a grown adult, and married to the love of her life. She knows that being the mom is not an elected office, and she understands that her mom will always be her mom. Nevertheless, Jessi still has a tendency to be a bit bossy, and that information came to me directly from her mom. Her family understands Jessi’s ways, and most of the time her bossiness isn’t a problem, but once in a while they have to straighten her out a little bit, and when that happens, Jessi is taken back to her three year old self, when she hears, “You’re not the mom” from her mom or siblings. It is something they do laugh about these days, because it is a cute way of saying, “Jessi, we are all adults here, and you are not the boss of us.” The age old comment of “You’re not the mom” is not usually followed with a three year old comment of “I’n da mom!!” But, once in a while when everyone is in the right mood, you might hear that comment from someone. Either way, they all end up laughing about the whole thing, and really, that is what the comments are all 
intended to bring about anyway, so everyone is happy.
As I said, Jessi is married now, and while they do not have children yet, I think it is her husband, Jason’s best interest that he be informed now, so there is no doubt about it in the future. Whether he likes it or not, in Jessi’s house, Jason does not get to be the mom. Jessi has been waiting for the day…all her life…when she will get to be the one arguing with her little three year old daughter over who gets to be the mom. Jason will simply have to settle for being the dad, because between them…this is not negotiable!! Today is Jessi’s birthday. Jessi, try not to argue too much…ok. Happy birthday Jessi!! Have a great day!! We love you!!
You have heard that for everything there is a season, and that is true in so many ways. One that I doubt if you ever thought about, is the seasons for things we do. Now this isn’t going to be a serious story about philosophical things, but rather it will follow a little bit different path. Typically, for most men, there is football season, baseball season, basketball season, and hunting season, with a few others thrown in there for some people. In times past, most women would have left this to the men, but that has changed, as there are probably an almost equal amount of women that like to do these things too.
As to the season for hunting…which I think just got over…but since my husband and I don’t hunt, I can’t say for sure. I do know that for years my parents went hunting, and I can remember the wild meat…cooked to perfection by my mom. It was so good. Not everyone can cook wild meat to make it not taste gamey, but she could. They went hunting with my grandparents, and I know that my uncles did too. 
Especially as young men. I doubt if my aunts went, as girls anyway, but I could be wrong on that. I do know that a lot of my cousins hunt…both male and female cousins, so it is something that runs in our family on both sides. Lots of the girls like to go hunting with their husbands, but the thing I find especially endearing are the girls who like to go hunting with their dads, such as my cousin, Jamie Patsie, who was not deterred when her husband Kevin couldn’t go hunting with her. She just talked to her dad, Terry Limmer, and the two of them made a day of it. That is such a cool thing too, because it gave them some father/daughter time.
The little girls in the family maybe can’t go hunting with their dads yet, but that certainly didn’t stop Meadow Nordquist from going out to see what her dad, Aron had shot, and even taking the opportunity to pose for a victory shot with him. She was very excited about her dad’s conquest. I think her sister, Addie was a little put off by the idea of sitting on a dead animal, so she would have none of this whole “picture with her dad’s conquest” thing. I suppose the time will come when she will think differently about that. It may be with her husband, and then her dad though. Time will tell on that, but little 
Meadow was very excited to see what her dad had shot…and I’m sure they will all enjoy the meat.
Like every other season, hunting has a season, and when that season is over, it’s over. I’m sure it is something everyone hates to have happen…especially if their hunt was not successful, but it is inevitable nevertheless. So, all I can say to that is that it is a good thing that football season is still going on, and basketball season will follow, and baseball after that. Before they know it, hunting season will be upon them again, and they will be back out there looking for the best buck. That’s just the way it is…to everything there is a season.
After my 2nd great grandfather, Allen Spencer passed away suddenly at the young age of just 56 years, my 2nd great grandmother, Lydia Spencer found herself in one of the hardest positions anyone ever has to face. In those days, few of the women worked outside the home, and with her husband and the bread winner of her family gone, she had some hard choices to make. She still had several children at home, including three sons and one daughter. Her daughter, Teresa would marry later that year, and eventually move to North Dakota. Her son Allen would follow his sister to North Dakota, and eventually move to Washington, where he would marry and live out his life. That left Lydia in Iowa, with her two remaining sons, Cornelius and Luther…at least for a time. That had to have been the hardest part of the time too, considering the grief she must have been feeing.
Luther married Ellen Dykes in 1885, and Cornealius married Leona Stinson on February 1, 1888. By 1900, the two brothers along with their families and their mother had moved to the Deer Creek, Oklahoma area. I know that in the years following their fathers death, these two men took on the role of caregiver of sorts for their mother. It wasn’t necessarily that she needed a caregiver, at only 53 years of age, but rather that these two brothers took on the role of picking up the pieces of her shattered life and helping her through the rough transition years, during which she went from being a wife to a widow. It isn’t that she was incapable, but it would be really hard to find yourself widowed at such a young age. You had thought you and your souse would grow old together, and now you have been left to try to figure out how to move on alone.
Little has been said about the role the two brothers played in her life, and I suppose that is because it was just expected of them and so everyone assumed they just did their job. I suppose that is true to a large degree, but there were other children in the family, and yet they chose to take on this role, and she chose to go to Oklahoma with these two sons, rather than move to North Dakota, Wisconsin, or Washington with her other children. She loved the others very much, and the pictures tell me that she saw them whenever she could, but she moved to Oklahoma with Cornealius and Luther, and lived in Luther’s home until her passing in 1906, at the age of 75.
It takes a very special person to move their elderly parent into their home, and I don’t just mean that parent’s child, but the spouse of that child too. You can’t take in your parent without the ok of your spouse, because this is going to affect the whole family. In this case, it is likely that the time Lydia lived with her son Luther and his family in Oklahoma, was about ten years, but in reality, that is a long time. The last days could have been very stressful and trying, given the way, aging parents get weak and tired as they get closer to death. Yes, I think that Luther and his wife, Ellen had to be very special people to make sure that Lydia was taken care of, and not lonely. I’m sure that went a long way toward picking up the pieces of her life, after the loss of her husband, Allen. That leaves me with a lot of respect for these sons and their families.
As our kids have grown, my sisters and I find ourselves along for the ride when it comes to Halloween. My grandchildren always seem to be working, so there are no little kids coming by my place…at least not that I know. For me, it could easily become just another boring evening, were it not for my niece, Jenny and her husband, Steve Spethman. Every Halloween, they have a party at their house. We all go over and they make green chili, and all the fixings. The meal alone would make the evening for sure, but it gives us a chance to see all the cute little costumes the kids wear. They have an abundance of trick or treaters at their house…every year. At our house, we usually get just a few kids, and then Bob eats the rest of the candy…and if I don’t watch myself, I do too!!
It isn’t just the kids that dress up for the party either. We have had pirates, gangsters, and Indians..to name a few. My daughter, Amy and her husband, Travis always dress up. They have come up with some amazing costumes…such as a stewardess and a rather large woman…which Travis pulled off quite well. It’s a time when the adults can cut loose a little bit too, even if it is a little bit risqué. Still, it’s kids costumes that I like the most. They kids always look so cute, and have so much fun getting a sugar high. This is a night when everyone can get a little bit crazy, because we all know it’s all in fun.
My daughter, Corrie Petersen and my niece, Kellie Hadlock have dressed up for work, and I know some bowling leagues dressed up for league nights that fell near Halloween, but I have never done either. I guess I have 
always thought of this as a kids day, but maybe I was wrong on that one. In fact, maybe I should dress up this year. I have been thinking of the perfect costume, and I think I might have it. I think I’ll go as a grandma. It suits me perfectly, and I should have everything I need. I’ve been told I don’t really look ;like a grandma, but I am, so that should work. I suppose there will be those at tonight’s party who will not think mine is a great costume, but I do. Being a mom and grandma are the things I do the very best, and the things I love to be the very most. Happy Halloween!!
When problems occurred with my blog site over the last few days, creating the need to change my theme, I found myself feeling a little out of sorts about the whole thing. I have always liked my blog theme, and even after considering a change now and then, I have not done it. Suddenly, I was faced with the requirement I had been dreading. I was going to have to change my theme, because it would not work with the latest program changes for the underlying program my blog uses. Ugh!! I quickly picked something, because the generic one that had been placed on my blog to get it back up, was…well, beyond hideous!! My daughter, Corrie Petersen put the new one in, and my blog went forward…with me feeling like I had an upset stomach, and her laughingly telling me that I was the only person she had ever heard of who kept the same theme year after year.
Ok, I know it, I am a creature of habit. I have never really liked change very much…unless it was in the area of technology, of course…I mean I would never prefer the stone age, for Pete’s sake. And while I suppose you could say that my theme is something in the area of technology, it is not like it is a computer or anything, so the creature of habit in me came out again. Corrie thinks it’s because the new one isn’t purple, and maybe that is part of it, but I like my big purple rose. I don’t know if color, style, or a certain flower could affect my creativity, but for some reason, it affects my sense of rightness in the world surrounding me, so it gives me an uneasy feeling. Is that maybe a bit of eccentricity, or is it just an artists prerogative? I can’t say for sure, but I know that when my blog doesn’t have the look of my blog, it just doesn’t look like Caryn’s Thoughts…at all!!
Since I knew I couldn’t find anything that would be similar enough to my favorite theme, I had to take action. I had to become a theme designer for myself. That way, no one could take my theme away from me, because the underlying updates would happen too. It was the only way to make this creature of habit feel comfortable in her own little world again. And with the right software, I found that it was easy and fun. I suppose that is just the technical side of me coming out. I have a lot of fun playing around with some of these programs. This program built beautiful website themes, and I found that I can easily change the background a little, to add variety, and yet still keep my logo and my favorite purple, so I have been experimenting with that for two nights. The funny thing about that is that I even with the changes, I still did not venture too far from my old theme. Oh well, I feel like all is right in my world, and that is the most important thing. I know that I am a creature of 
habit, and that I don’t like change. And I know that my daughter, Corrie finds that pretty funny, but I’m quite comfortable with who I am, and I don’t see much sense in worrying about changing me now. In the end, there were a few glitches with the themes I created…mostly because I am a novice web designer, and didn’t know what things meant. We are still working on fine tuning it, but I’m quite happy with the way it looks, because it is me. When we work out the bugs, I think all will be right in my blogging world. Thanks Corrie!! I love you!!
Things have a way of coming full circle in life. I remember, so well, the point when my daughter, Corrie and her then new husband, Kevin Petersen left their wedding reception. All of the planning, the ceremony, and now the beautiful reception were over, and the kids were on their way to their honeymoon, and then their own lives. I had held up so well, and yet, after I kissed them goodbye, and they left, I turned and said to my sister, “Well, they’re gone.” Suddenly, and without any notice, the tears welled up in my eyes. My baby was leaving home. My world was mixed up, and…well, wrong, but they were so happy. This was so right for them.
A few very short years later, my daughter, Corrie was dropping their oldest son, Christopher at my house for me to take to her sister, Amy Royce who was going to babysit him, along with her daughter, Shai. Christopher was just six weeks old, and Corrie’s maternity leave was over. As Corrie came in my door, she was already crying, and I knew just how she felt. Everything felt so mixed up, and wrong for her too. Christopher had not been away from her since his conception, and now he would be on the other side of town with her sister. While she knew he was not so far away, and she would see him at lunch, so she could nurse him and spend that precious time with him, he was, nevertheless, not with her. We normally think of this separation as only happening to the mother of the baby, but that isn’t really so. I think it’s just as hard to leave your baby, when you are the dad too.
Every milestone along the way has been rather bittersweet for Corrie, and for Kevin too. Kevin always tried to hold it together for Corrie, but this change is different, and it has hit both of them and both of their sons Chris and Josh very hard. On the 29th of this month, Corrie and Kevin took their boys on a camping trip that will always be different than any other camping trip. They went to move Chris to his college dorm in Sheridan, Wyoming. Both Corrie and Kevin are struggling with this drastic change in their lives, and 
it would not surprise me to hear that there were tears all around. I know it would that way for me.
It is so hard to take your baby to a different town to live…even if that baby is now eighteen years old. Everything about that feels so mixed up, and seriously wrong. It’s not that it is so very far away, but rather that Chris won’t be living with them anymore…at least not for a while…like three years…other that holidays and summers. After that, it’s hard to say. Lots of kids never move back home after college, even if they move back to the same city. Things may never really be the same for them again, and that is what makes it all so terribly hard. That is what makes this so mixed up…and wrong, and yet, so right for Chris, and so necessary.
Through the years, I have seen many changes in my nephew, Steve Spethman. As a young boy, he…like all boys, was mischievous and full of good natured teasing. Since Steve is my nephew, through his marriage to Jenny, my niece, he has only been a part of our family for twelve years. That said, most people might not have known what kind of boy he was, but I knew him, long before Jenny knew him. Steve wasn’t a bad boy…just a boy, and since I had girls, boys were a little foreign to me. Steve also grew up in a family of girls, since it was his mother, sister, and him. Maybe he got away with more than he might have, but he was the little man of the family, and with that came a lot of responsibility too…or at least Steve decided that it was his responsibility.
When he met my niece, Jenny, and then they got married, he took that new responsibility, of being a husband and later a father, very seriously. He became the head of the family, confidently leading his family in the ways they should go…teaching his children what was right. His years of being the little man of the family, had prepared him for being the head of the family. He confidently stepped into the job of being a loving dad to his kids. They meant the world to him. Steve and Jenny were the parents of three sons, Xander, Zachery, and Isaac. Then finally their next baby was to be a daughter.
Losing their daughter, Laila was probably the hardest thing that ever happened to Steve and Jenny, but instead of falling apart, he held them all together. Then after taking a huge leap of faith they stepped out, and tried one more time for a baby daughter, and were blessed with Aleesia. With their life finally filled to the full with a long awaited daughter, Steve began reaching out to other people who had lost a child. His comforting ways have soothed many a broken heart, and lead them to know that all hope is not lost.
I have seen Steve go from being a tough little boy, to a strong man, to a broken hearted man, to a man who can help others heal. The changes have been astonishing. I am quite proud of the many changes that have occurred in him. I’m sure most are the normal changes that occur, but some of them are changes that he has allowed the Lord to make in him. Those are changes of opening his heart to wise teaching, and that is something that has to come from within the man himself. No one can make us accept wise teaching, but us. And that is probably something in Steve that has never really changed. Today is Steve’s birthday. Happy birthday Steve!! Have a great day!! We love you!!
Every year I find myself surprised at how many years my kids have been married. This year is my daughter, Corrie and her husband, Kevin Petersen’s 21st wedding anniversary. Twenty one years…how can that be!! Of course, they have been together for 24 years now, and that is even more surprising to me. They should both still be kids…not have kids who are adults or almost adults. How could time have passed so quickly? No matter why or how, they have arrived at that 21st anniversary, and because they did, Bob and I have been incredibly blessed. They gave us two wonderful grandsons, Chris and Josh, and so many other blessings, as they have given of themselves whenever we needed something. They have proven to be a wonderful couple who have given of themselves to make life wonderful for those around them.
When kids are teenagers, you have no idea who they will become. They are so emotional that you wonder if they will live long enough to become adults…or if you will live through those teenage years, but then…suddenly, as quickly as they became teenagers, they become adults, and you are left to wonder where all those years went. We could not have asked for better adults than Corrie and Kevin have become. I love their ways of teamwork and fellowship. They are so connected to each other. Theirs is a love for all time. They are soul mates, and that is how it should be.
Every parent hope that the marriage of their child will last, and we are no exception. When your daughter gets married, you almost hate to let her go. You pray that this man will treat your princess with the love and respect that you know she deserves. Kevin was that knight in shining armor that Corrie was looking for. He may not have had a horse, but he drove cars with plenty of horsepower!! Thankfully for her momma, Kevin was not the show off kind, and he felt no need to race around, he just liked those nice cars…still does, by the way. But more 
important than his cars, is his family.
Kevin became a “sold out” family man on February 28, 1996, and he has never gone back. He and Corrie are all about their family. Whatever their boys are doing…is what they want to be doing or watching. Whether it is sports, cooking, fishing, camping, games, or just hanging out…that’s what they do. Theirs has been a wonderful journey, and one they are happy they took together, and I’m so happy that they’re happy, because really that is what it’s all about. Happy 21st Anniversary Corrie and Kevin!! You have made our lives rich with your kind ways. Have a lovely day!! We love you!!
