Kids
One might think that with each passing year, the loss of a child would get easier, but that could not be further from the truth. That child was a part of you even if they were stillborn, or passed away a few short days later, as was the case for my grandniece, Laila Spethman. Laila was the first daughter of my niece, Jenny Spethman and her husband, Steve. She was beautiful and sweet, and she was gone far too soon…before most of us ever got to meet her, in fact, and even though, her parents have been given a rainbow daughter named Aleesia, she cannot take away the pain of loss Laila’s family feels, especially on this, the day of Laila’s passing at just 18 days old.
Laila would have been six years old this year, and having a great time in kindergarten. I can picture her running and playing with all of her new little friends, as well as her siblings. I can picture her and her mom doing all the girly things that moms and daughters do…nail polish, hair, and cute clothes, as well as shopping, playing dolls, and picking flowers. She would have been the apple of her parents eyes, as well as the rest of the family. She would have been a wonderful little sister to her brothers, Xander, Zack, and Isaac, and a wonderful big sister to Aleesia. Her family would be complete…if only Laila were still here. If only.
My niece, Kelli Schulenberg, who is married to my nephew Barry Schulenberg, reminds me in some ways of my dad’s family. She has a bit of a call to the open road sometimes…ok, most of the time. Kelli and Barry often travel to go to concerts, because they love country music. My husband, Bob and I used to travel to national bowling tournaments and then take a week to make a vacation out of it, so I can relate to that kind of traveling. It’s a great way to see the country, and I think that is what Kelli and Barry had in mind. In fact, it’s possible that if it weren’t for Kelli, Barry might not have traveled as much as he has, but I could be wrong about that. Maybe it’s Barry’s idea, or maybe both. Either way traveling to various concerts has allowed them to see a number of great places. Kelli has an eye for photography too, and her pictures of their travels allow her friends and family to follow along on their journeys.
Kelli and Barry are avid hikers, and they love the outdoors in general. If it’s summer they hike, and in winter they snowshoe and cross country ski. They are often joined by their moms and other family members. In fact, hiking is something many of us in the family love to do, so sometimes, we are quite a crowd, but there is nothing wrong with that. Nevertheless, Kelli doesn’t mind the occasional solo hike either. And now that cell phones take such great selfies, we all get to go along on those solo hikes too. Hmmmm…is it still a solo hike if we all go along? Of course, my guess is that they may not be solo hikes anyway, since I expect that Kelli and Barry’s dog, Dakota gets to go along on some, if not all of those solo hikes.
Probably the one thing that Kelli has always wanted, but doesn’t have yet, would be her beloved donkeys. Kelli 
loves them, and really wants to raise them. I can see that, because the donkeys are a highlight of our trips to the Black Hills. Maybe that dream will come true for Kelli. I hope so. I think donkeys are so sweet, and it would be fun to have some in the family. The rest of us might just have to make an occasional trip all the way out to Kelli and Barry’s just to pet the donkeys. Or maybe she would hope we wouldn’t. That could be a lot of people, after all. Today is Kelli’s birthday. Happy birthday Kelli!! Have a great day!! We love you!!
My sisters, Cheryl Masterson, Caryl Reed, Alena Stevens, Allyn Hadlock, and I were group texting yesterday, as we often do. It gives us the chance to be together, without needing to be in the same room. We love those conversations, because we can laugh with, and at, each other, in good fun, of course. It also gives us a chance to share ideas on everything from our faith to politics, and be thankful that we all agree on both. We keep each other informed if we are traveling, just like we did our parents, when they were here on Earth. Those texts are part of what keeps us close. We all work and Caryl lives in Rawlins, while the rest of us are in Casper, so our lives are busy, and we can’t always get together on a regular basis. Texting, especially has become a great way for us to connect, and we all love it, because we love each other very much and always will.
Our family has always been a close one, and our parents, Allen and Collene Spencer instilled values in us about faith, right and wrong, and family. They are values that we will never allow to fade from our lives. Mom has been in Heaven now for almost two years, and Dad for almost nine years, and yet we can still hear their voices in our heads guiding us in love. They taught us to laugh, and not to be upset when we were the one being laughed at, because it’s better to laugh with those who are laughing at you, than to get upset about it. And in the end, you usually have to agree that it was pretty funny anyway. We were taught that laughing at yourself is a good thing, and while we may not always have practiced that, we have learned that it is a true statement. Sometimes the worst thing we can do is to take ourselves too seriously. Laughing at ourselves helps us to remember to put humor in our lives too.
Around the holidays, however, our conversations often turn to our parents, and how much we miss them. Such was the case with our conversation yesterday. My sister, Alena saw an old friend of our parents, and wanted to tell Mom that she had seen him…then reality set in. I mentioned a story I had written about a piece of family history I had found, and how I couldn’t wait to tell Mom…then reality set in. My sister, Cheryl had received a catalog, and saw a glittery top that Mom would have loved, and thought it would make a great Christmas present for Mom…then reality set in. My sister, Allyn has taken Mom Christmas shopping for a number of years, and the thought came to her that she should ask when Mom wanted to go…then reality set in. The conversation 
continued with each of us mentioning times that we instinctively thought of calling Mom and Dad, asking them something, taking them somewhere, or just how much they would love something, only to have reality set in again. All we have now are the sweetest memories of the greatest parents on Earth. We can see them in all the places they were…the house, church, our homes, the drives they loved to take, the front porch where they loved to sit and enjoy the day, camping in the Black Hills, and picnics on Casper Mountain…all the places they loved. All the places where their echo still exists and their memory still lingers. Reality always sets in, and we know they are gone, but they will always live on in our hearts and minds, and they are in our future now, not our past.
Every year as the month of November arrives, my niece Jenny Spethman and her husband, Steve meet it with a sense of dread, because it is the month when their daughter, Laila Elizabeth was born and eighteen days later passed away. The grieving process has been a long and empty armed one. It’s not that they don’t have other children, because they do, and in fact, they have another daughter as well, but each child is a unique gift from Heaven, and when one is not with you, whether they passed away or moved away, your arms are simply empty where that child is concerned. No new child can replace the child who is gone, and no one can say how long the grieving process will be, or even should be, for any one person, or their loss.
Still, I think that time changes, not the sadness of a loss, but rather how we are able to compartmentalize our feelings. This year as I listened to how Jenny handles this month, I found myself in awe of her…courage. She told us that one thing that helps her to prepare for the month of November, is to watch shows about near-death experiences. It helps her to be able to glimpse Heaven from the perspective of one who has had a glimpse of it themselves. To hear of the love and peace they felt while experiencing Heaven, and to hear of loved ones they saw there, gives Jenny a feeling of hope in the knowledge that their daughter is not in their past, but rather in their future. And that future is bright and beautiful, even if it seems very far away right now. Laila is in a beautiful place, and she is happily waiting for her family to join her.
After Jenny told us about the shows she watches, and how they had helped her so much, she was talking to her boys about how the month of November is a sad one for her, but today…November 4th, which is Laila Elizabeth’s 6th birthday, should not be a sad day, because it is the day that they received the gift from Heaven that is Laila Elizabeth. It is the day she was born, and that will always be a special day, because it is her day…her birthday. Any other day in the month can be a sad one, but this day, Laila’s birthday is a day that her family received a great blessing that will always belong to them. It is the day she was presented to them, and she was beautiful. Their love for their little girl…their first little girl, after three beautiful boys…knew no bounds. She couldn’t have been more perfectly beautiful. Now, six years after her passing, even though the rest of the month will lead to the sadness of the 22nd, they find themselves able to rejoice in the gift from Heaven that Laila was, and the gift in Heaven…waiting for their arrival, she will be in their future. Happy birthday in Heaven Laila Elizabeth. We love and miss you very much, and we will see you soon.
Halloween started out as All Hallows’ Eve or All Saints’ Eve. Originally, it was to be a time dedicated to remembering the dead, including saints (hallows), martyrs, and all the faithful departed. These days, very few churches still practice it in that way, if at all. Yet, many of the Celtic traditions from Ireland that were there before Christianity came to the area, are still observed. Activities include trick-or-treating, attending Halloween costume parties, decorating, carving pumpkins into Jack O’Lanterns, lighting bonfires, apple bobbing, playing pranks, visiting haunted attractions, telling scary stories and watching horror films. Since I’m totally not a fan of horror movies, and thankfully, my husband, Bob agrees with me on that, we avoid the horror movies at all costs, and are pretty happy when Halloween is over, because then there aren’t so many horror movies on television. 
Over the years, the costumes worn by kids and adults alike have changed. Very few people want the traditional costumes anymore. Now it’s things like superheroes, cartoon characters, firefighters, or even period costumes, like Vikings or pirates. These days, anything goes. If it interests you, you can make it a costume. I’ve even seen people dress their little ones up as a Lego block, or a car, complete with the body of the car attached to the child’s waist. The creativity is amazing, and I wish I had thought of some of those things when my girls, Corrie Petersen and Amy Royce were little, because it would have been so cute. I wasn’t very inventive, so the girls were kind of the normal things, but my girls got more creative than I did with their kids…or maybe the costumes just got better.
With the adults getting in on the action, you will see more parties and even people dressing up at work. Some 
offices even have contests to see who has the best costume. It’s all in the fun of the day, and lots of people spend quite a bit of time getting ready for the activities. My niece, Jenny Spethman and her husband, Steve always have a party. It is something our whole family looks forward to. Unfortunately, this year, Bob and I will have to miss out on the fun, because we have to bowl. We are disappointed, of course, but there is always next year. Happy Halloween everyone!!
My niece, Susan Griffith is a sweet, kind of quiet girl, who loves living in the country and being outdoors. She loves doing all the homemaker things, like baking cakes, and this time of year, baking pumpkin seeds, which her whole family absolutely loves. Susan and her husband, Josh live out in the country, near his parents, who have horses. That gives their girls, Jala and Kaytlyn, and them the chance to ride horses sometimes, which is very cool. This summer, Susan was able to work from home, so her girls actually got to sleep in and had more time to enjoy their summer. I think it was really nice for Susan too, because she got to really spend some quality time with her girls. Most of us work, and so having a whole summer with the kids is a real gift.
Susan and her family love to go camping, and in the past, that meant sleeping in a 
tent, but no more. This year they bought a trailer, and camping took on a whole new meaning. If you have ever slept in a tent, you know what I mean. The ground is hard, even if you do have an air mattress. The nighttime coolness doesn’t stay outside of the tent…it’s right in there with you. And if it rains…well, it’s in there too, or at least that’s how it was with any tent I ever slept in. A camper is so much more comfortable…and, cooking is easier too. Susan and her family love camping, and all that goes with it, so hiking, fishing, and kicking back around the campfire are things they love to do. I can relate to that, especially the smell of coffee heating over a campfire. It doesn’t get better than that. Susan and her family often go camping with her sister, Machelle Moore, her family, and their parents, Debbie and Lynn Cook. It’s a huge procession to their favorite camping destination, the Big Horn Mountains, where they all have a really great 
time every time they go.
Sometimes I find it hard to believe that Susan, or the rest of the kids in the family, are grown up already. I remember them as little kids, giggling, running all over the house, and fighting as much as they played, but now, they have all grown into wonderful adults, who are still friends…and funny thing, they don’t fight anymore. The years just go by too fast. Before long it will be those same kids who are looking back on how quickly the years went by with their own kids. That’s why we all have to treasure the time we’ve been given, and I think Susan definitely does. Today is Susan’s birthday. Happy birthday Susan!! Have a great day!! We love you!!
Because I go to my sister, Cheryl Masterson’s house to have dinner with her and her family on Thursday nights, my relationship with all of her family has become closer. Her daughter-in-law, Dustie Masterson always helps with the meal, because she loves to cook, and she is a very good cook too. Dustie works at Albertson’s in the Fresh Cut Produce Department. That gives her the job of making the salads, and things like salsa and guacamole, and believe me, what she makes is the best. One of her specialties is the Seven Layer Salad, which is a family favorite, and was recently used as part of the food for the rehearsal dinner of her niece, Katy Collett and her new husband, Jake.
Dustie would really have to love cooking, to do it all day and work, and then come 
home and cook some more. Most people don’t feel like cooking after work anyway, but with her job, that would really be a lot. Dustie has been at Albertson’s for a while now, and has worked her way up to supervisor…an accomplishment she is proud to have achieved, and we are proud of her. Dustie is a very happy person, and is almost always smiling. That makes her a favorite among her co-workers, as well as with the rest of us. I love her sense of humor, and her teasing, joking ways.
Dustie is mom to Raelynn, Matthew, and Audrianna, and wife to my nephew, Rob Masterson. She has been a part of our family now for almost 14 years, and 
she has been a wonderful addition to the family. She is my sister, Cheryl Masterson’s only daughter-in-law, and she has been such a blessing to Cheryl, our parents, and me over the years, especially during the time when we were so busy taking care of our parents, and Dustie ran a countless number of errands for us. I’m sure Cheryl has told her how much that meant to us, but I think it’s worth mentioning again. We really appreciate all you did to help us during those years, Dustie. Your kind heart and loving ways have blessed us more than you could ever know, and we are so glad that you are a part of our family. Today is Dustie’s birthday. Happy birthday Dustie!! Have a great day!! We love you!!
My nephew, Tucker Birky loves school, and learning in general. He is in advanced classes and doing very well. He is bringing home advance homework, and is a year ahead in Math, and two years ahead in Reading. I’ve always said that a child who can read well, can pretty much write their own ticket in this world. Tucker also plays the piano, which is a skill I would love to have, but I would have to cut my fingernails, and that’s not happening. Tucker doesn’t have that problem, so he’s in good shape. Tucker also has a desire to go into politics. He wants to be president of his student council. That is a great aspiration. He is kind and helpful, and that has made him popular at school too, so it’s quite likely that he could be elected the Student Council President. All I can say is, “Tucker, if you run for President of the United States someday, please be a Conservative. We need more Conservatives.”
Like a lot of boys, Tucker loves to ride his 85 Dirt bike. And he loves to shoot. For his birthday this year, he got an air gun, and his face literally lit up. Tucker loves the outdoors and camping, and all that goes with it. Which brings me to his step-dad, my brother-in-law, Ron Schulenberg, who is his dad, as far as Tucker is concerned. Ron is his very favorite person, and his mom, Rachel Schulenberg tells me that if Ron is around, she has to fight for Tucker’s attention. They might be out in the garage working on something, or outside riding, or just hanging out, but when Ron is there, Tucker wants to be with him. And then there’s the cat, Jack Jack…yes, that’s two Jacks, and Tucker dearly loves Jack Jack. So, if Ron isn’t home, I guess Rachel has to compete with Jack Jack. That doesn’t sound like a win/win situation at all, but it seems to be the way with kids. When you get them grown up to some size, they suddenly have too many other things to do to spend much time with you. It is the way it is, but the parents don’t like it.
Tucker has set some future goals for himself too, which is somewhat unusual for a boy of just nine years. 
Tucker has decided that he wants to join the armed forces, and serve his country. In this day and age, when many people have lost their patriotism, it’s heartwarming to see that Tucker has not, and that he will someday be in a position to make a difference in this world. I don’t think he has decided what branch of the service appeals to him, but there is time for that. His step-dad was in the Army, so it wouldn’t surprise me to see Tucker follow in his footsteps. For now, he is enjoying life and his favorite things. Today is Tucker’s 9th birthday. Happy birthday Tucker!! Have a great day!! We love you!!
My grand niece, Reagan Parmely is a busy little girl. I think that her most important job, at least in her opinion, is being the big sister. Reagan takes it upon herself to help her little sister, Hattie to do things like climbing the hay bales. She also takes her for walks in the mud, and for rides in her truck…yes, Reagan has a truck…that runs. Together, they help around the farm, taking care of the animals, and cuddling the babies. As sisters go, Reagan and Hattie are best friends. Reagan teaches Hattie things…like pushing her big sister on the tricycle, and how the tell the difference between weeds and flowers. They have great times together.
Reagan is a helper. She loves the farm animals, and is a great help when it comes to their care. The size of these animals doesn’t bother her one bit. Most kids would be at least a little apprehensive around a cow or horse that is more that twice their size, but not Reagan, or her sister, Hattie. They know how to act around the animals, and the animals are very gentle with them. Reagan likes to make sure that all the farm animals are where they are supposed to be, In fact, all animals have a proper place, and they should stay there. In Casper, where we live, 
there are two statues of horses eating the grass at the Quality Inn, and every time Reagan’s family drives by there, Reagan proceeds to tell those horses that they need to get back home to their corral. Now, don’t misunderstand me, she knows they are statues. She just likes saying that to be funny, and we all think it’s funny too.
Reagan likes mobility…of any kind. She rides horse, motorcycles, her truck, bicycle, and of course, the standard walking and running. And she’s pretty good at all of them. I think she was born riding something…or shortly thereafter. She takes everyone in her truck, or at least the ones that fit. I’m not totally sure how the dogs feel about it, but they ride along, so I guess she must be a pretty good driver. Reagan has grown up around a dad that loves motorcycles, a mom who loves horses, and an uncle who loves trucks, so none of this is particularly surprising to me. She has already had her first motorcycle accident, and while she had a shiner, she is a tough 
girl, who doesn’t give up. She gets right back on and goes again. She loves hiking with her Oma, my sister-in-law, Jennifer Parmely, and riding her bicycle with her Aunt Brenda Schulenberg, who goes by BR. Together they all work on staying healthy and active. Reagan also loves to work with her grandparents, Albert and Kari Eighmy. They have safe tools for her to use, and she helps them build things around their farm. She loves having all of these people who let her help with things, because she likes to be busy. Today is Reagan’s 4th birthday. Happy birthday Reagan!! Have a great day!! We love you!!
My niece, Ashley Parmely, who married my nephew, Eric five years ago, was raised largely in the country. She loved horses, dogs, and cats, which I knew, but what I didn’t know was that she really loves all animals. Since she and Eric bought a house next door to her parents, initially to be near her beloved horses, I have found out that her love of animals knows no bounds. She probably could have been a veterinarian. Ashley and Eric, now have goats, chickens, cows, and even little piggies. Some of these may belong to Ashley’s parents, but that makes no difference. Eric, Ashley, and their girls, Reagan and Hattie take care of the animals as much as anyone does. They just love being around the animals. Ashley is teaching her girls to take care of, and be gentle with the animals, and in turn the animals love the girls. It’s a beautiful thing to see, and Ashley treats us to lots of pictures of the her family with the different animals.
Lately, Ashley has been working to get her goats milk tested, because apparently if you are going to sell the milk, it has to pass a certain number of tests to show it is of good quality. I never knew that before, but I guess if you are around farm animals, and plan to make some money off of them, you have to find out all the quality control details first. Growing up with a farming background, Ashley knew that, and of course, her parents also did, so they could show her the ropes. Ashley and her little family are all working together to make their little farm a great success.
Of course, farming isn’t the only thing Ashley is about. She loves being a wife and mother, and her family’s happiness if her first priority. She is such a good mother…playing with the girls, and teaching them new things. 
The girls like to go on walks and hikes with their parents, and Reagan, being in preschool, is learning new things including Spanish…but I’m getting ahead of myself, because that is tomorrow’s story. You see, four years ago, Ashley was given a wonderful, but one day late, birthday gift, when little Reagan arrived. Now her life is very busy with two very active little girls, and a farm full of animals. It’s a far cry from the single life she had before she and Eric were married, and one that makes her very happy. Today is Ashley’s birthday. Happy birthday Ashley!! Have a great day!! We love you!!
