dance
Seventeen years ago today, we gave our youngest daughter in marriage. I am always amazed at the passage of time. It just doesn’t seem possible that they could be celebrating their 17th anniversary already…at least not in numbers. As a couple, they are a perfect match. Oh, they have their little fights, like any married couple does, but they just compliment each other so well. They both have a great sense of humor, and in their house is much laughter…something that truly is essential in a home if you ask me. I have heard all of the marriage tips there are out there in my own 37 years of marriage, but to me laughter is one of the most important ones. A home without joy is a very gloomy place to be.
Every parent wants the man their daughter marries to take good care of her and above all to love her with all his heart, and Travis has never let us down in that area. When they got married, Travis, who is a year younger than Amy, was just out of high school. Many people would have never expected it to last, but they fooled the naysayers. Sometimes, you know who you want to spend the rest of 
your life with immediately and that is exactly what happened. Amy and Travis worked together at Target in high school, and Amy had noticed Travis before their actual meeting, and thought he was cute. They actually met in person at a dance club for teenagers in Casper. From that moment on, they were destined to be together.
They dated for about a year, and then decided to get married. I could say that the rest is history, but there is no typical love story, really. Every love story is as unique as the people who are a part of it. Their lives have taken many twists and turns…from babies to career changes. I am very proud of how they have handled each and every turn in the road. Seventeen years is a big achievement these days, and I’m so happy for you both. Happy anniversary Amy and Travis!! Have a wonderful day!!
There is a country music song by Brad Paisley, called “He Didn’t Have To Be” about a step-dad who was more of a dad than a real dad ever was. After talking with my cousin, JeanAnn, I am convinced that those words describe my cousin Elmer, JeanAnn’s uncle very well too. JeanAnn was a little girl with a need, and Elmer became the dad to JeanAnn, that he didn’t have to be…he chose to be. JeanAnn tells me that Elmer raised her, like she was his own daughter, stepping in to fill a void that desperately needed filling, and not only helped a little girl who needed it, but filled her heart with so much joy and pride, that when she speaks of him, it all comes flowing out like a beautiful waterfall.
When JeanAnn was a very little girl, Elmer bought her a Tweety Bird that said “Hello Buddy!” He and JeanAnn always used to say that to each other, but JeanAnn was to little to say it right, so it came out “Hello Bud!” The name stuck, and Elmer became forever Uncle Bud, and I have a feeling he didn’t mind that, because his very special little niece gave that name to him. Rewards just don’t come sweeter than that!
Some of her fondest memories happened in the month of July. She tells me that she can’t remember one year, except the few that she didn’t live in Casper, that she didn’t spend July 4th with her uncle. Back when you could set off fireworks on your own, they shot off fireworks in Glenrock, along with the occasional hillside fire, of course. Sometimes, they watched the fireworks displays from Elmer’s shop, where she got to play with the various gadgets he had made or bought. Later, when he got a boat, they often spent July 4th at the lake, watching the displays, boating and playing in the water. JeanAnn never had to worry about missing out on the festivities, because she had an uncle who was so good to her, even though he didn’t have to be. When the fair rolled around, JeanAnn always got to go. At the fair, she and her Uncle Bud would ride all the rides. One year he had hurt his back, so JeanAnn was worried that he might not be able to go, but he still took her, and rode the rides with her. She was a teenager by then, and his giving nature meant 
so much to her. Elmer was always there when she needed him.
Now JeanAnn is grown, with children of her own, who need a man in their lives too. Uncle Bud stepped right in, without ever being asked, and did the same things for Mykenzie and Ethan. He took Kenzie to her first father/daughter dance, and was there for Ethan’s first play. He spent 2 hours last Christmas putting a Lego toy together for Ethan. He has done so many things for JeanAnn, Kenzie, and Ethan, that there simply isn’t enough room here. Just suffice it to say that when other men wouldn’t do for their children, Uncle Bud came to the rescue for at least 3 of them, and became the surrogate dad…he didn’t have to be.
It takes you by surprise sometimes. You meet someone, and your heart skips a beat. You think to yourself, “Whew, he is so handsome!!” Then you just have to wait, and hope he asks you out. After what seems like forever, he finally asks you out, you find yourself floating on cloud nine. That’s how my mom described her first meeting with my dad. She was immediately smitten, and she never looked back. That’s how it is when love comes along.
That’s the way my dad felt too, and he never looked back. He had found his dream girl, and he knew that they would have a wonderful life together. Dad was always such a giving man, and kindness was no stranger to his personality either. When he loved someone, he loved them wholeheartedly. I suppose that is exactly what attracted my mom to him in the first place. She knew this was forever. Love had come along.
Through the years, much changed, such as the addition of 5 daughters, and a move from Casper, Wyoming to Superior, Wisconsin, and back again. Mom was a stay at home mom for most of my childhood, and sometimes that meant Dad would work 2 jobs, but he never complained. It was his duty, and he was a man who took his responsibilities very seriously. We never lacked for anything we needed, but the most important thing that we had an overflowing abundance of in our home was love. Mom and Dad saw to that, and taught us to love one another unconditionally. It didn’t matter if we made mistakes, they were forgiven and forgotten. No matter how bad. We always knew that love forgave anything we could do.
Yes, there were many changes through the years, and looking back now, 
I wish that I could have stopped time somehow…especially in the later years, but you can’t do that, so the aging process took place. Still the love never faded, and there were certain traditions that never ended, such as the New Years Eve party every year to celebrate the new year of course, but more importantly to celebrate my mom’s birthday on New Years Day. That party always included Mom and Dad’s dance. We all stood around watching, because it was such a beautiful event. One that was just naturally occurring when love comes along…and then stays for a lifetime. Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad!! We love you both, and Mom and your daughters and families are looking forward seeing you again Dad…maybe for that first dance in Heaven.
As the time for the school dances arrives again, I am reminded of my oldest daughter, Corrie and her husband, Kevin, and the dances they went to. They fell in love when Corrie was just 15 years old, and one of their favorite things to do was to go to the Co-Ed Ball and Prom. They went to both of them each year from the time the began dating until Corrie graduated. They were like Cinderella and Prince Charming. Theirs was a fairytale romance…love at first site. My beautiful little girl was becoming a beautiful young lady. She looked so pretty.
The pictures done, they headed out to their romantic evening, with eyes only for each other. Love blossomed at those dances, as well as their other dates, but it is always those special evenings that stand out in your memory. The dance committees had created an evening of moments with balloons, crepe paper, cardboard, and spray paint. An evening to remember.
With each new year and each new dance, they grew and changed…blossomed really. I remember that I was always so proud of the handsome couple they made. But, along with that thought was the little feeling of sadness that my little girl was growing up so fast. You know the one. That feeling that you suddenly want to put on the brakes and slow down time, but you know that you can’t. So you smile and wipe away a tear or two, and send them on their way to their evening to remember.
Every year these dances come around, and a new set of students head out, all dolled up. A new group of parents think back to the day their child was born and wonder how it could be possible that they are already heading out for their high school prom, or other such dance, and wish they could turn back the clock, so that their little one could still be their little one.
When we are young, we think that life is a long time. We wonder when we will get to be the grown up one, heading out on that special date, and before we know it..we are already sending our own children out on an evening to remember.
Yesterday, I talked about a New Years Eve tradition in our family, but the annual height measurement isn’t the only tradition we have on New Years Eve. As I said, we always have a party at my mother’s house for New Years Eve, because New Years Day is her birthday. We always move the kitchen furniture into the living room, and part of the living room furniture into Mom’s bedroom, so that the kitchen can be free of furniture, because part of the party is the dancing. A big part of the party is dancing, and the kitchen floor is the dance floor.
During the party, various people, young and old, get out there and dance. We play a variety of music, from rock to country, so everyone has the kind of music they want to dance to. Some of the cutest dances, as everyone knows, are the ones the little kids do. And, when we aren’t dancing, we are eating the delicious food that each family brings to add to the celebration, and there’s plenty of room to talk about all the good times and the many memories our family has been blessed to share with each other. The party spreads from the living room to the back yard, and even the front yard when midnight rolls around and it’s time to bring in the new year with the beating of the pans, and firecrackers…but that is another story.
And, there is one tradition that, while it doesn’t happen every year, is really cool…when we can talk him into it. My brother-in-law, Mike Stevens, has the ability to do a dance that we fondly call The Rubber Knee. I would love to tell you how he does this dance, but I’m not even sure Mike knows how he does it. The Rubber Knee is an Elvis Presley type of dance move that requires the dancer to have the ability to almost dislocate his knee…not really, but it sure looks like it. And try as we might, there has never been another family member that can duplicate The Rubber Knee. It is a dance that is unique to it’s owner. Mike is a great dancer, and that particular dance will always be remembered as something that had to be done before it could really seem like New Years Eve to our family.
My family recently re-connected with a side of the family that we had been out of touch with for a few years. Since that time, we have been going over some of the old memories that have a tendency to live in the hidden parts of your mind for many years, and then when the first little recall is triggered, they come flooding back like a tidal wave. We have talked about my dad and her mom, brother and sister, now both living in Heaven, and of course still getting choked up at times, but still very much enjoying the memories. We talked about all the great times our parents used to have.
My sister, Cheryl had asked my cousin, Shirley if she remembered the Onion and Mustard Sandwiches that they had eaten and loved as kids. Shirley said she did, and that it was her dad, my Uncle Jim, who started those with onions and butter, and then somewhere along the way they tried it with mustard and liked it too. Now to me, that’s is totally disgusting, but to each his own…as long as they don’t try to feed it to me, of course, I suppose the fact that I don’t like onions could have something to do with my reason for not wanting anything to do with this concoction.
That conversation turned to a blog I wrote a couple of days ago called The Dance. That story got Shirley to thinking about the dances my parents and hers used to attend, and sometimes the kids got to go too. And the New Years Eve parties with dancing and fun for all, but the thing that really dominated the memories in this conversation was the “contests” our dads used to have to see who could come up with the most outrageous food combinations, and them eat them…good, bad, or horrible!! And whether these concoctions were designed to torture my Aunt Ruth, or my dad and my Uncle Jim, we aren’t entirely sure, but all I can say is I would love to have seen the look on their faces, when one turned out to be “the horrible” because I’ll bet it was great!! And to top it off, these stubborn…or is it crazy men, ate those goofy concoctions…just to prove that they would.
Those memories are so funny, and now that they have been stirred again, we will be reliving them for many years to come, I’m sure, but what really strikes me as wonderful about this whole thing, is listening to my sister and my cousin going back and forth with memories and sharing a laugh…even if it is a virtual one via Facebook. It just warms my heart to have this precious cousin back in our lives again. And as the years go by, I know the memories will continue to flow like a river over parched land, quenching the thirst in our hearts where we keep our parents who have gone on ahead of us, until we all see them together once again, in Heaven.
My Aunt Deloris…Aunt Dee as we all lovingly called her…was an amazing woman who left us far too soon, and I still miss her very much. I remember her beautiful smile. She was always a very happy person. I have been thinking a lot about her lately, and had the chance to visit with my mom about her. Mom had a several great stories to tell that I think you will enjoy too.
My mom describes her sister as very inventive. One time when they were little girls, Aunt Dee came up with an idea that involved Grandpa’s long trench coat. She and my mom went out into the street. Aunt Dee put her arm in one sleeve of the coat and my mom put her arm in the other sleeve. They put their other arm around each other, and ran down the street into the wind. My mom said, with a far away look in her eye, “It felt like we were flying.”
When Aunt Dee was in 5th grade, her class learned the Mexican Hat Dance. She was so excited about it and enjoyed it so much that she came home and taught it to all her sisters and brothers. Mom can still picture that dance in her head. And another time, Aunt Dee went down to the river and got a bunch of fish and put them in a wading pool at the house, because she decided that the other kids would really enjoy it. And they must have, since it was never forgotten.
But, probably one of the greatest things my Aunt Dee ever did was when she heard that a place in town was selling pianos for a really great price, $35.00, which was a lot of money back then. Aunt Dee worked really hard to come up with the money, and went down, picked out a beautiful piano and gave it to her family. They all enjoyed that piano through the years, and as one of many grandchildren, I can say that her gift was even more far reaching than just her siblings and parents. It was played by grandchildren and great grandchildren alike. Little did you know, Aunt Dee, what a loving impact you would have on several generations of this family. You are loved and missed by all of us.
