hair
When my girls were little, curls were all the rage in hair styles. It’s funny how hair styles change, and we change with them. When you are a teenager, it is vital to wear your hair the right way. Later on in life, we wear what we like, because each of us knows the style we feel most comfortable with. And the trends don’t matter so much.
As a kid, I hated curlers. They were so uncomfortable to sleep in. The minute electric curling irons came out, I swore off curlers for good. I’ve never gone back. Funny thing is that for my girls, I somehow decided that curlers were ok. I guess it’s a right of passage, I had to go through them, so they would be fine in them too. I did try to use the softest versions I could find, because the goal, after all, was curls, not torture. At some point, I tried the curlers my mom had used on us as kids…socks. I guess every parent does what they can to make their child as comfortable as possible, while still achieving the desired effect…curls. The biggest problem now was getting the curls to last. Corrie’s hair did pretty good, but with Amy’s straighter hair, not so well.
Their curly haired years didn’t last very long, so I guess they didn’t like curlers either…even of the sock variety, which were much more comfortable than they other types. I still liked curls in their hair, so we tried perms and curling irons, but in the end, or should I say, as adults, they have both opted for the straighter styles, and it’s probably for the best. I think I like straighter hair 
better after all. My own hair has just enough natural curl to have tweaky looking spots, and frizz when it is humid, so I now use a straightener on it.
The days of sock curlers were funny and short lived. Unfortunately, I don’t have a picture of the girls in those…or at least not one I can get a hold of right now. It’s probably best anyway. My girls have been really good sports when it comes to the pictures I post of them, but they really might draw the line at having sock curlers, tied in knots all over their head. Nevertheless, they did wear them, and that is a picture that will live in my memory for a long, long time. It was just so cute!!
Little girls usually have such fine hair that it seems to have a mind of its own. Mothers can try just about anything they can think of to keep it down, but it does no good. I think sometimes the only thing that will keep a little girl’s hair under control is Elmer’s Glue, and that would be a little odd!! I suppose the kids might find that fun, but I can only imagine how awful it would be come bath time. Other than that, I seriously doubt if most little girls care about having glue or anything else in their hair, and in fact, will gladly put food, or any other sticky thing in their hair that they can get their hands on, if you let them. In fact, I think my grand niece, Aurora likes looking goofy. She loves to laugh about being a silly girl…especially if she can make other people laugh too.
The way those little girls’ hair looks after they have been sleeping is especially funny. We’ve all had bedhead, but most of us brush our hair before anyone ever gets to see our hair. These poor little girls are forced to sit there for that wonderful bedhead picture, while we laugh at the end result…and yes, I have laughed too. I don’t believe the little girls in our pictures really care about what their hair looks like, at least not until they become teenagers, when they might find the pictures embarrassing, but I highly doubt it. Little kids are too busy having fun, and from what I’ve seen with my own girls and granddaughter, those goofy bad hair day pictures are something they love to laugh about.
Now, take a step backward in time, and you will find that the thing the women had to tie up 
the unruly hair of their little girls were not as good as they are today. They didn’t have hair clips, ties, and rubber bands, but rather used ribbons, which didn’t really stay in, as most of us know. I’m sure that is partly why my mother-in-law’s hair was such a mess as she played with her dog on that windy day. It didn’t bother her at all, except that she kept having to brush it out of her eyes. That is really the only reason any of us are bothered when our hair is flying around completely out of control…except for the snarls that is. Some things just come with the territory, and I guess, snarls, hair in our faces, and otherwise wind blown hair, are simply a part of life, and what girl among us has never had bedhead, a bad hair day, or wild hair…not one of us, right.
Recently, while looking through some old school pictures, I came across one of my own, that I vividly remember being very embarrassed about as a kid. It was silly, I suppose, but at the time…I just couldn’t believe it. Back then, the photographer couldn’t be totally sure that the subjects eyes were open, or that they smiled, or if they had hair in their eyes, or much else about the picture until it was developed. They looked through the view finder, but there was that second when they snapped that picture where they just had to hope the subject held the position they had seen them in just long enough for the picture to be taken. And film cost money, so they didn’t take several shots in the hope of having one turn out…at least not until the senior pictures were taken and the family was paying for all that film.
The other challenge a photographer faced, was getting a child to smile when they maybe didn’t feel like doing so. With no parents there to make the child sit still and smile, the photographer was on his own, so he would usually come up with any funny comment he could think of to guarantee that coveted smile in each of the hundreds of school children that passed in front of his camera on any given day. Sometimes, that was a huge challenge. Kids might have had a bad morning, didn’t like what their mom made them wear, or didn’t like their hair. Whatever the case, kids can be very temperamental when things aren’t going their way.
I don’t recall ever being one of those children who didn’t smile for the camera, but still the photographer didn’t know that, so he had to do what he felt was necessary to guarantee my smile. In this particular year, the photographer thought he had it all figured out, and on the smile part, he did, but there was just one small problem…the eyes. No, I didn’t close them, as you can clearly see, but I wasn’t looking at the camera either. When I saw the picture, I thought, “Oh yuck!! I look goofy!!” I couldn’t have retakes, because the stipulations for retakes were things like eyes closed or hair in the eyes, not eyes looking up. You might be asking yourself, what was she doing that caused her to be looking up. It’s a valid question and one that I can still answer for you. This is the look you get when you ask a little girl, “Do you have a boyfriend?” I always did those days, of course, but I had to think about whether or not I was willing to tell the photographer that. You might be wondering why my hair didn’t bother me too, but that was the style then…my goofy look wasn’t. I just have to wonder if he asked the girls that particular question after that.
You never know what babies have on their minds. They sit and watch as the world goes by around them. While others get in on all the fun, babies are just stuck, sitting in a high chair, stroller, or in their mommy’s arms. Always held onto, and very seldom free to run with the rest of the crowd.
My grand niece, Aleesia is one of just such a baby. At a little over 1 year in age, she still gets carried much of the time, and she doesn’t find that a bad thing…usually. There are times when she wants to get down and do her own thing, but when she is not at the house, there are fewer opportunities for her to have that freedom she wants. And with 3 brothers and her mom and dad, she gets held a lot even at home…as it should be. Still, her brothers get to go and do so many things that she does not, and that fact does not go un-noticed by our little Aleesia.
Sometimes, when her brothers are goofing off together, she begins to feel left out, and 
that…is totally unacceptable. After watching her brothers talking, playing and laughing for a while, Aleesia decides that it is time for them to remember that she is there as well, and they just need to pay attention to her too. In a recent picture shoot, while the family was on an outing, my niece Liz, Aleesia’s aunt, was taking pictures of just Jenny and the kids. They were doing a group pose, and the boys were having a good time joking and laughing amongst themselves, when Aleesia decided that they had ignored her long enough.
Jenny was holding Aleesia in the picture, and Liz…who must have seen what was about to happen…just kept shooting. Aleesia decided that the best way to get her brothers’ attention and get in on the fun, was to reach down and grab Isaac’s hair. I had to wonder how she even managed to get a hold of it at all, because it isn’t very long, but she did. Now, her other brothers thought the whole thing 
was hilarious, and Isaac wasn’t upset by it either, because those boys think their sister is the greatest thing since sliced bread, but it was a bit if a shock to Isaac, nevertheless. And, a person can only take so much hair pulling, so Isaac had to defend his hair, and disengage his little sister’s fingers from it, but since Liz was still snapping those pictures, I was able to see the whole thing play out almost like a movie. And since I’m sure Isaac got to keep his hair in the end, I got to see the totally humorous side of the situation, when little sister got into mischief.
Having your child on someone else’s birthday can be a very cool thing, as I have seen with my own daughter, but having your first child on your own birthday would be even more cool, if you ask me. That is exactly what happened with my grandmother and my Aunt Laura. It was like a birthday present of sorts. I know how cool that shared birthday was for my daughter, Corrie and her grandmother, Bob’s grandmother. They loved it and shared every birthday party for as long as Grandma was still alive. Corrie always felt like she was Grandma’s Girl.
In looking at my grandmother’s photo album, I could easily see that same relationship with Grandma Spencer and Aunt Laura. They liked each other…which is different that loving each other. Many people love their family members, but really don’t like some of them much. Grandma and Aunt Laura went places together, and did things together, and it didn’t seem to be just because they were mother and daughter. I have to think it was partly because of that shared birthday.
As I look at the pictures in the album, many of which my Aunt Laura is in, it occurrs to me that, now I would know her, as a child, anywhere. She was a pretty little girl with long beautiful hair…something my sisters and I also had as kids, and two of us still do. She played the violin as a child, but I’m told she didn’t like it much, and yet she loves classical music, which so often includes the violin. I guess there is a big difference between playing 
an instrument and listening to an orchestra. On that point, I would have to agree with her. I used to love to listen to the music wen my girls were in orchestra and band, but for me to make those instruments play anything like music…well, can you say “sick duck” or even imagine what one sounds like…that would be me trying to play Corrie’s violin or Amy’s clarinet. I guess that Aunt Laura got pretty good, as did her sister, Aunt Ruth.
My Aunt Laura would have been 101 years old tomorrow, on her mother’s 126th birthday. I know she, my dad, and my Aunt Ruth, along with many other cherished family members are waiting in Heaven for the day of our arrival, and I look forward to seeing them once again. Thinking of your both Grandma and Aunt Laura on your birthdays tomorrow. We love you very much.
For centuries moms have been trying to find new ways to add bling to their daughters look. Maybe it wasn’t always called bling, but moms of daughters know that if you don’t add bling, everyone thinks you had a son…and there is nothing worse than having people think that your little princess is being mistaken for a prince. It’s really never to early to add bling to your little girl’s look, and the options are endless, but there have been some things that have evolved over the years. One of them is the headband…or bow, as it probably started out to be.
When my girls were babies, they didn’t make headbands for babies. I was told to use corn syrup to hold a little bow on their heads so they looked like girls…not that corn syrup worked, but I gave it a try. I decided to put bonnets on my 
girls, because I couldn’t make anything work to keep a bow on their head, until they finally had enough hair to use a teeny rubber band and whatever ribbon was handy…gift wrap worked quite well. Needless to say, they wore bonnets for a long time.
Headbands have changed a lot over the years, and the modern baby headband is probably the most stylish of them all. These days baby girls can wear anything from bows, to flowers, to their parents team colors, but in the twenties, headbands looked a little bit like the sweatband that people used to wear a lot to control sweat on the forehead during workouts. I’m sure the people living in the twenties thought they were very stylish, but to me they looked a bit like a devise used for carrying baskets of food from the market in some of the Middle East countries. The band often has big bows on the sides, and it makes the little girl’s head look huge…but that’s just my opinion.
There is nothing new about headbands and other bling, except the name. I remember putting nail polish on my kids and granddaughter’s nails at a very young age. They loved it. It made them feel pretty, and as all women know, that is the name of the game. I don’t think it is even as important to look pretty to others, as much as it is to feel pretty to ourselves. When you wake up, and nothing works with your look, it makes you feel…well, blah!!! It is a completely unacceptable feeling, and when you add a little bling, it just improves the whole look. And it doesn’t matter if you are 1 month or 80 years old. Girls…very simply…like bling!!
I don’t know about your family, but in mine and in Bob’s, the women seemed to wear curlers in pictures a lot. The funny thing about that is that the ones wearing curlers in pictures have short hair, which would dry very quickly. So it would seem that there would be little need for wearing curlers all day, and yet here they were in picture after picture. It’s almost as if the curlers are a way to keep their hair under control for a while, much like people with long hair might wear a bun. Curlers in your picture seems to be something rather unique to my mother’s and grandmother’s 
generations. I know that my sisters and I would not have been caught dead outside the house with curlers in our hair…at least when we were old enough to have a say.
What always struck me as funny is the fact that whenever Mom had curlers in her hair, and the event was special enough for pictures, it seemed like Mom’s intention was to look good for the event that was upcoming. So, it always made me wonder why she left them on for the event itself. Of course, they never left the curlers in for the really special events, like church, weddings, 
or funerals, it was just the casual, special events that seemed to allow for curlers in the picture. There again, I would never show up for those events in curlers either, and knowing my sisters as I do, I know they wouldn’t either. It’s kind of like going out without your make up…it just isn’t done.
Nevertheless, that was a different generation. I’d like to say it was a different time, but my mom still might wear curlers in a picture, and think nothing of it. I suppose Bob’s mom might too, if she didn’t have a perm now. To that I say, to each his own, but you will never catch me in a picture with curlers in my hair.
Bob and I grew up during the hippy years of the mid-1970’s. All the guys wanted to have long hair. Bob’s hair was, by no means, as long as many other guys had, but it was quite a bit longer than he had while he was living at home. Like most parents, he was told to keep it short, while he was living at home. So when he graduated, he moved into his own place, and grew his hair longer…much to the irritation of his mom. I met Bob about 6 months after he had moved out on his own, so his hair was already longer.
Bob and his family had always had a great relationship with their family who lived in Forsyth, Montana, which is where Bob’s family came from. The family would go up there to visit at least once a year, and Bob didn’t change that tradition when he moved out. His uncles weren’t so much older than he was that they really seemed like uncles exactly, so he got along with them very well. After Bob moved out, he would go to Forsyth just to hang out with uncles, and visit his grandma. Eddie, at 11 years older and Butch, at 9 years older were, nevertheless, the older generation. When Bob was 19, Eddie was 30, and Butch was 28. They pretty much sided with Bob’s parents when it came to the length of a man’s hair.
The older generation took great pleasure in teasing Bob about his hair. I’m sure that he heard things like “you look like a girl” or “shaggy dog.” I’m also sure he was repeatedly told to get a hair cut. Of course, like most kids in the hippy generation, those comments had no real effect on him. Nevertheless, I’m sure Eddie got Bob’s attention when he decided to tell Bob, “We can fix that right now!!” Then, he proceeded to attack Bob, or rather, Bob’s hair with an unplugged electric hair trimmer. Eddie would never really cut Bob’s hair, and I’m pretty sure Bob knew that too, but in the moment, maybe he wondered just a little bit, while genuinely hoping that the trimmer wasn’t plugged in.
Most babies have a tendency to grab anything that gets near them, especially long hair. My grandson, Caalab was not an exception in that, except for the fact that he never pulled. From the time he was 6 months old, he has played with my hair in one wary or another. Not every woman likes having her hair touched or played with, but I do, as do most of my family members. To me, it is very relaxing, and I could let him do it all day. I have fared well in that too, since his mom, my daughter Amy is pretty tender headed, and his sister, my granddaughter, Shai doesn’t like it at all, so Caalab had to wait for his grandma. How blessed was I on that one?
As I said, Caalab started playing with my hair when he was about 6 months old, and he never pulled on it. I have never seen a baby be so gentle with hair in my life. He gently ran a few strands between two of his little fingers from top to bottom. I guess he liked the way the hair felt as it ran between his fingers…just like his grandma does. To this day I play with my own hair, unless I can get someone to do it for me.
As the years have gone by, the way Caalab has played with my hair has changed. He is a very creative boy. He has brushed, twirled, flipped, and slapped my long hair, as anyone who knows him can attest, but he is very gentle. My Dad used to get a kick out of him at church, because when we stood up to sing, Caalab would climb up on the chair and start to play with my hair. I suppose some people might think he shouldn’t be doing that in church, but he was very well behaved in church, and all the church members knew what he was doing, and they always had to smile about it. The 
way I saw it, he wasn’t running around getting in trouble, and he wasn’t crying. It was a win-win situation.
It is my guess that Caalab will always like to play with someone’s hair. I feel very blessed to have been on the receiving end of so many relaxing hours while he played with mine, and as for his girlfriends, and his future wife…they will need to like to wear their hair long, and love having it played with. And take it from someone who knows, you will be blessed for years by this habit Caalab has. And if you get tired of it…send him to his grandma’s house, because I’ll be happy to let his play with my hair.
The newest member of our family has finally arrived. My nephew Eric, and his wife, Ashley gave birth to Reagan Kaylynn Parmely today, October 24, 2012, at 9:49 am. She weighed 7 pounds 10.5 ounces, and she was 21 inches long. She has dark brown hair that is about an inch long. She tried really hard to arrive on her mommy’s birthday, yesterday, but that was not to be. She missed it by a few hours. That is a fact that I’m sure her parents will forgive her for. They are just thrilled that she is here now.
When Eric and Ashley started planning a family, Eric told her that he wanted daughters. You see, his was a family of three brothers, of which Eric was the youngest. His family had always hoped for a girl, but it was not to be. Eric had always hoped things would be different for him, and so when Ashley became pregnant, they waited anxiously to see if the baby would be a boy or a girl. Finally the day of the ultrasound arrived, and it was discovered that Eric would get his wish. Their child would be a girl. Eric was floating on air.
Ashley said she wanted a boy first, but like most mothers, that doesn’t matter once that precious little one is snuggling up in her arms. Little miss Reagan Kaylynn will fill her heart with so much joy that she will wonder why she ever wanted a boy first, and when the next baby comes along, Reagan will be the best little mommy’s helper ever. Little girls are like that…mommies from the start.
As the years go forward, Ashley will have someone to go do all the girlie things that 
Eric won’t be very interested in doing. Yes, in the teenage years, they will disagree over probably everything, and Reagan will most likely be a drama queen at times, but those years will quickly pass, because children grow up in just a minute, when you consider how quickly time passes. Before they know it, she will be dating, driving, graduating, marrying, and having babies of her own. Does that seem like an exaggeration, take it from someone whose daughters did just that, just a few weeks ago, or was it really 37 years ago since my first daughter was born. Enjoy this wonderful time Eric and Ashley. It goes by so fast, but watching little miss Reagan Kaylynn grow up will be the most wonderful experience of your life! We are all so happy for you!!
